Here's something to ponder: Who unvited you? Read on

For more than a month I've been unable to respond to e-mails at the address below, although I was receiving them until Friday. If you previously hadn't included your phone number, I was not able to thank you for your input or ask followup questions.

Considering my mounting IT problems, it seems like a perfect time to respond to some of your e-mail, eh?

Re: Kris & Kim

Let's start with this: If residents of a state can be jingoistic, that's what many Minnesotans apparently are regarding Kris Humphries. Leave MN and we are too through with you. We also don't give a rat's tuchas about your world-famous future wife!

"I read with interest your coverage of Kris 'Dark Hole' Humphries late arrival at Seven. Since Kris, or should I say his father, Will, manhandled the Gopher basketball program back in 2003-04, I've made it a point to boycott any Five Guys [a chain in which the Humphrieses own franchises]. And to think he'll be marrying a [Kim] Kardashian, who's famous for a big butt and being a friend of Paris Hilton. I couldn't think of pairing him with a better suited, sure-fire candidate for a failed marriage. Thanks and yes, I feel better," wrote John.

After saying nice things, and asking me to check on some new WCCO-TV hires, Carole K.B. ended her e-mail with: "Really tired of the Kim/Kris memos in the paper, magazines. That's my only complaint."

Ponder this!

"Yes, we have an athletic looking youngster, well educated, and a washout coming in to tutor. Sometimes poor work ethic, carefree and not in shape even for a two minute offense. Will a rookie pick up bad habits? Will Ponder adapt to his ponderous counterpart? Experts have an over/under win number around 6 and a half. Last year you nailed the right record and were quiet about it. Will you be releasing a prediction before the start of the season? Ronald J.T."

Dear Ronald,

Better that Ponder follow the on-the-field habits of McNabb than an allegedly retiring guy like Randy Moss.

In print I have not boasted about correctly predicting the number of Vikings wins last season. But all my friends know!

Usually I have to see a couple of regular games before I make a prediction. By the way, I've correctly predicted Vikings wins a couple other times, one of which Sean Salisbury can confirm.

Rob O'B. said, "You complain about Magic Johnson's usage of the nonexistent world HISSELF yet I can't find the word UNVITE in any direction."

Rob O'B., Jay S., B Ingram, Amy C. and others: Please check out an Urban Dictionary.

HISSELF: "Used in place of 'himself' by non-educated, moronic, toothless wonders from the 'hills' or the 'hood.'"

UNVITE: " To un-invite somebody. After you have given an invitation you change your mind ... and un-invite them."

I love clever new words but not in place of perfectly good ones such as "himself."

"That's AWESOME. AWESOME!! Great work. It's official: I cannot read CJ without instinctively reaching for popcorn," e-mailed Brooks.

Walking on Nicollet Mall, a woman named Jessica humorously told me, "That hearing aids benefit in St. Paul couldn't handle one spicy black woman?" Funnier yet is that every national news story I saw about the benie said it was in Minneapolis!

And Carrie P., who applauds the good works of the hearing aids company, wrote: "What gets to me is the local media and their red carpet reporting. 8-3-0 in particular is falling all over these celebrities. Congratulations on your badge of honor."

The above item may require homework, so Google "C.J., Startribune.com, July 20, 2011, unvited, unrepentant."

And speaking of homework, is there anybody lazier than a Dennis Douda fan? I wrote that the gentleman WCCO-TV anchor appears to be on his way out and that inspired many of you to ask me this: Why didn't you include the e-mail address and phone number of the general manager?