Born out of a series of Tweets by commenter @RandBallsStu
, an idea by your humble proprietor and a sick thirst to rile up Packers fans for no good reason, we present, "The Increasingly Lost Season." In this series, which is now in its second year, Stu will give a brief recap of the Packers' misfortunes as they tumble back toward Randy Wright-esque putridity (even if that probably isn't true). Stu?
Green Bay stunned the football world last Sunday, edging the injury-ravaged Chicago Bears at Soldier Field 33-28, thanks to some timely hero ball from Aaron “Hollywood” Rodgers. The diminutive former starter had spent most of the game making Packers fans regret their most recent shabby treatment of Money Matt Flynn, who was rewarded for saving their season with a cruel, midweek benching. (Happy holidays, Money! At least we didn’t cut you!) Rodgers led the Packers on a late TD drive against the Bears' devastated secondary and delivered an unexpected playoff berth for the once-great franchise.
How unexpected? The best fans in football somehow forgot to buy tickets to this Sunday’s game! Thousands of seats were available for purchase, but they just weren’t biting. Perhaps fans were confused by the seats being tangible things with actual worth, rather than fake stock certificates. With a blackout of a Packers playoff game (!!) in Wisconsin (!!!!) looming, myriad local businesses stepped in on Friday to buy the many, many remaining tickets. Go Pack Go?
If you want to know another reason why, just look at this week’s opponent. The San Francisco 49ers are coming to town, and the Lambeau faithful are sadly aware of what that means. The Niners -- who are road favorites in this game, mind you -- have eaten Green Bay’s lunch of late regardless of location, and in the unfriendly playoff confines of Daunte’s House, it’s hard to imagine Aaron Rodgers, Money Matt or even former Vikings great Brett Favre doing much to change that. You’re better off hoping that this is finally the week that the Green Bay defense finally buys into Dom Capers’ system.
(It’s worth reminding you that Capers went to night school in the offseason to figure out how to beat Colin Kaepernick and the read option after the Niners blew their doors off in the playoffs. This resulted in Green Bay giving up 412 passing yards and 34 points to the same team in yet another loss to San Francisco in this season’s Week 1 rematch. That game was also notable for working-actor-who-dabbles-in-football Clay Matthews tackling Kaepernick by the neck about 40 yards out of bounds. The former is out for this game. It won’t matter.)
In an increasingly lost season, can Green Bay, doubted by the nation and even their own “loyal” fans, pull an upset for the ages at Daunte’s House? No. No, they can’t.