DaveMN's excitement level over the next week is closer to "Denard Span" than it is "Ron Gardenhire." He explains himself here, as the co-Commenter Of the Week. Dave?

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Apparently, I earned myself a co-COW this week, by witnessing the funniest thing I’ve ever heard on live audio during a sporting event, posting it on YouTube (24,000+ views in about 24 hours), and then having Deadspin pick it up. I’ll take it. This one’s for you and your “sensitive area”, Simoni.

This week is pretty much what being a sports fan is about. The only way it could be better is if the Twins were playing the White Sox to decide the division. I don’t know, but I just can’t muster up much hatred for the Detroit Tigers. They were so [redacted] awful for so many years. They’ve done a great job of buying, trading for, and developing talent. Those are three things the Twins haven’t done well lately (although Delmon seems to have finally decided to swing the bat like a professional, making the trade only look “horrifying” as opposed to “catastrophic”). Here’s hoping that, no matter what happens this final week, the Twins make some significant and well-conceived moves this offseason. Note: I’m not holding my breath.

Next, the Gophers take on the Badgers at The Vault on Saturday. You know, if I win the Powerball on Wednesday, I’m claiming it immediately in hopes of purchasing tickets to this game. Hell, I just want to be on campus to swim in the atmosphere of mutual disrespect that comes with playing Wisconsin. I wonder if there are any “Better Dead than Red” t-shirts left at the Bookstore.

Sunday, the final Twins game at the Dome. It seems like such an odd “event”. “Let’s pack this [redacted] stadium because it sucks and we’re leaving!” If they’re facing Greinke again, I can only hope for a return to his status as certified headcase. I want to watch the end of the Tigers game on the Jumbotron again and watch the Twins go crazy in the dugout. Here’s hoping.

Monday, Vikings … Packers …Monday Night Football. Holy [redacted][redacted]!