Crowds can be brutal, unreasoning beasts, subject to panic and other deadly enthusiasms. Why, they had to shut down the New York Philharmonic for a month in '42 after six society matrons were crushed by a mob wanting to see Toscanini perform Shostakovich's 7th symphony. The tradition continues:
Minor injuries, thank heavens. Additional carnage was prevented when organizers used bullhorns to shout "WHY, IT'S THE GUYS FROM THE TWILIGHT MOVIES, OVER THERE, SHIRTLESS AND IN NEED OF UNDERSTANDING." The girls did not know where to look, but at least this stopped them from moving forward.
Bieber later sang a song on Aussie TV. In related under-20 heart-throb news, Aaron Johnson. the 19-year-old star of "Kick-Ass" is engaged . . . to a 43-year-old women . . . who's a mother of two . . . and pregnant with Johnson's child. Yes, this will end well for everyone.
Sure you are, kid. Sure you are. On the other hand, at least he's marrying the woman who's carrying his child; in modern Hollywood, this practically makes them Woodward and Newman.
