10 top cocktails: The drinks

August 17, 2012 at 9:06PM

The Big Ginger

Where: The Local
Ingredients: Two shots of Jameson whiskey, ginger ale.
Price: $6.

  • Barbara: I can see why this could be dangerous.
    • Joe: Why would you waste Jameson by putting ginger in it? Whiskey for beginners.
      • Jake: This is pretty easy drinking.
        • Amanda: It's an alternative to beer.
          • Emily: A watery, heavy, good guy's cocktail.

            Jenna Jameson

            Where: Temple
            Ingredients: Jameson whiskey, ginger syrup and ginger ale, served with chunks of ginger.
            Price: $10; $7 from 5-6 p.m. daily.

            • Joe: Is this supposed to smell like a porn studio? Not as sweet.
              • Moe: Better than the Big Ginger.
                • Amanda: Tastes the same as the Big Ginger.

                  The Local may be known for its Big Ginger, but the Temple's very similar Jenna Jameson was considered superior by most of the Drinking Squad.

                  Night of the Hunter

                  Where: La Belle Vie
                  Ingredients: Imperial vodka, Licor 43, Oloroso sherry and sea salt, garnished with Marcona almonds stuffed in green olives.
                  Price: $12.

                  • Barbara: This tastes like butterscotch.
                    • Moe: I want to put it on pancakes.
                      • Joe: I just don't get it. I couldn't do a whole drink. Weird, salty sweet.
                        • Emily: Good taste, overwhelming. A dessert drink.
                          • Amanda: It burned my throat. The olive is a good complement.

                            The Drinking Squad went all out sampling La Belle Vie's creative cocktail menu. Other favorites: the Parlez-Vous, City of Light, Fire Women and Margie Had Sex in the Pantry.

                            The Zombie

                            Where: Red Dragon
                            Ingredients: Bacardi Dark, Bacardi Light, Bacardi 151, Myers's Rum, Red Dragon's juice mix (sweet and sour, pineapple juice and orange juice).
                            Price: $9.

                            • Emily: I'm not overwhelmed. Here's a $9 drink that's gonna get me drunk. The younger ones seem to love this dirty bar. It brings me back to college.
                              • Joe: My new breakfast drink -- it's like Sunny D.
                                • Barbara: A quintessential rum drink.
                                  • Amanda: It's like fresh-squeezed grapefruit juice.

                                    Wondrous Punch

                                    Where: Red Dragon
                                    Ingredients: Bacardi Dark, Bacardi Light, Bacardi 151, Myers's Rum, grenadine, Red Dragon's juice mix.
                                    Price: $9.

                                    • Emily: The Zombie, but sweeter.
                                      • Joe: It's the same drink! If the Zombie is my new breakfast drink, this is my new brunch drink.
                                        • Barbara: It's boozier than the Zombie. Tastes like Kool Aid or Crystal Light. If you drink too many of these, you're puking.
                                          • Amanda: About the same as the Zombie, but easier to drink and get totally drunk.
                                            • Moe: I wouldn't have any more than a Dixie cup. A whole one would be too sweet. A college drink, for people who want to get drunk.
                                              • Jake: A rummy taste, but still citrusy. I still like the Zombie better.

                                                10:45 P.M.: One down, five to go. Barbara's husband shows up at the Dragon and they leave. With five bars left on the itinerary, the rum is starting to hit the remaining squad members. Here's where they start getting giggly.

                                                Standard Margarita

                                                Where: Bar Abilene
                                                Ingredients: Sauza Blanco tequila, Triple Sec liqueur.
                                                Price: $7.95.

                                                • Moe: Holy tequila, Batman!
                                                  • Joe: Whoa! Retch. That is some shitty tequila. I can't drink it with a straight face. I can't stop puckering.
                                                    • Jake: That's a margarita.
                                                      • Amanda: The best margarita I've ever had. It reminds me of Mexico.
                                                        • Emily: It's a decent margarita, but it can't be the best margarita in Minneapolis.

                                                          Crack Ho Mojito

                                                          Where: Chino Latino
                                                          Ingredients: Cruzan Junkanu Citrus Rum, mint leaf, sugar, mojito mix (lime juice and sugar), and three kinds of fruit purée (passion fruit, blackberry and raspberry) for mixing.
                                                          Price: $13.

                                                          • Joe: It tastes like the Witch's Brew from Temple. So sweet -- never have more than one.
                                                            • Emily: Very artsy -- tangy, but delicious.
                                                              • Amanda: There are many variations. You can mix your own.
                                                                • Jake: It tastes good.
                                                                  • Moe: The best cocktail in the history of the universe. It's fun. It's what you want it to be. Crack-ho deliciousness!
                                                                    • Amanda: The name says it all.

                                                                      11:45 p.m.: The Drinking Squad is practically chased out of a packed Chino Latino forsitting in the closed-off dining room. Oh well, on to the next bar.

                                                                      Dreamsicle

                                                                      Where: Town Talk Diner
                                                                      Ingredients: Ice cream, Triple Sec, vodka, candied kumquats.
                                                                      Price: $11.

                                                                      • Emily: Like the Crack Ho, it's fruity and too filling. One drink and I'd be done if I'm trying to get a buzz. It's too thick.
                                                                        • Amanda: This seems like it's about 1,000 calories. Very filling and very good.
                                                                          • Moe: There's always room in my stomach for ice cream. I heart "adult malts."
                                                                            • Joe: An after-dinner drink. I love it, but I like my liquor a little more clear.
                                                                              • Jake: It makes sense that it's on the summer menu. Malty.

                                                                                The squad also liked the Trix-flavored "adult malt" Silly Rabbit ($11).

                                                                                The Greenie

                                                                                Where: Tony Jaro's River Garden
                                                                                Ingredients: Vodka, sour, Green Glacier mix, Tom Collins mix.
                                                                                Price: $4.50.

                                                                                • Amanda: Not my thing. Tastes like antifreeze.
                                                                                  • Moe: It's like Hi-C Ecto Cooler. Ghostbusters!
                                                                                    • Emily: Good, but it's not like I'm going to call my friends at home and tell them about it.
                                                                                      • Jake: It's like a popsicle. One of my favorite drinks -- anybody can drink it and not feel effeminate.

                                                                                        The Suffering Bastard

                                                                                        Where: Psycho Suzi's Motor Lounge
                                                                                        Ingredients: "It's a secret." Various boozes and spices, served in a tiki mug.
                                                                                        Price: $6.95.

                                                                                        • Jake: This tastes like medicine.
                                                                                          • Emily: Pretty nasty. Worst drink of the night -- pure bad alcohol!
                                                                                            • Moe: It's like paint thinner.
                                                                                              • Amanda: It's very strong. This is too much for me.

                                                                                                But the Drinking Squad did recommend Suzi's Paralyzed Polynesian.

                                                                                                about the writer

                                                                                                about the writer

                                                                                                Stephanie Dickrell

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