The Energizer Bunny has nothing on the Al Franken-Norm Coleman election saga. After a will-it-ever-end campaign and recount, the legal phase has been another exceedingly long slog. Think about it: Way back on Election Day, many of us were wearing short sleeves. Will this election ever end? Have we landed in a continuous loop like "Groundhog Day," an interminable process like "Waiting for Godot" or a truly endless ring of purgatory? Hard to say, but we should be used to suffering things that seem interminable. Consider:
Movies
• The commercials and trailers before every feature film.
• The wait for the next "Harry Potter" movie.
• Any Steven Spielberg film.
Songs
• "American Pie."
• "Artistic" interpretations of the national anthem (such as Roseanne Barr's infamous 1990 version).
• "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall."
Late night
• A ringing telephone during an intimate encounter.
• A dog barking at 3 a.m.
• Waiting for your kid to come home after midnight.
Sports
• The last two minutes of a basketball game.
• The Vikings' stadium quest.
• The Vikings' Super Bowl quest.
Tours
• Fleetwood Mac "reunions."
• "Fiddler on the Roof" road shows.
• Cher's "farewell" tour.
Obligations
• Certain ministers' sermons.
• A misbegotten blind date.
• Most any work meeting.
Celebrity sagas
• Divorce aftermath (Brad and Jen).
• Rehab stints (Amy Winehouse).
• Surgeries (Joan Rivers).
Minnesota-centric
• Four cars arriving simultaneously at a four-way stop.
• Saying goodbye at a Lutheran hot-dish potluck.
• This winter.
Bill Ward • 612-673-7643