Is there a problem with baby carrots? Of course not, you might think. Ha! Shows what you know. You'll never get anywhere in the worrywort biz, pal. Here: learn from a master.

They're milled, sculpted from the rough, soiled, mangled things we call carrots, and they serve as an example, though perhaps not a terribly grave one, of how disconnected we have all become from the production of our food. "The majority of consumers have no clue what they’re eating or how it’s produced," said David Just, a professor of behavioral economics at Cornell who studies consumer food choices.

Hmm. At least he pulled it back a bit, and said the problem wasn't terribly grave. Let's skip down to the section with the subhead "A Too Perfect Snack."

As people have found themselves with less time to sit down at restaurants or even cook at home, convenience has guided all sorts of decisions about food, especially when there is an option that requires little more than opening a packet. "Baby carrots have transformed the way people think about carrots," said Just, the behavioral food economist. "The fact that you don't have to peel them, that it involves so little prep, is key." "Baby carrots are also small enough to fit in your mouth," he added. "They're bite-sized and ready to be eaten. They're easy."

You feel bad for the reporter, who probably turned in a perfectly good piece and had the editor send it back: find me an expert. And so we get to the end:

The truth is that it probably doesn't matter all too much whether someone understands that the smooth little 2-inch carrot cut-outs they're devouring didn't grow in the ground. Just maintains that knowing this probably wouldn't change anyone's consumption patterns, save perhaps for a small group of hardcore naturalists, since the processing involved is comparatively minimal. But that doesn't forgive the disconnect.

On behalf of all Americans, let me just say this: The disconnect is hereby absolved. You now have some mental space freed up to worry about something else.

POW This week marks the 50th anniversary of ABC's "Batman" premier. It was enjoyed by adults who saw it as a comedy, and children who thought it was serious. Someone put all the fight-scene words in alphabetical order. I'd put it here, but someone did a lot of work and deserves the traffic, so: LINK. Some of them stick out: Bang-eth? Crunch-eth? Clank-est? Whack-eth? Wham-eth? Had to be some Olde English villain. But who? The list of Batman adversaries is here - see which one you think gets the -eths. There are two choices. I'm going with Norton.