I know what you're thinking: The Vikings, historically the biggest tease in town, are at it again.
Just when you were ready to start using your face paint to touch up your purple AMC Gremlin, The Future Los Angeles Vikings go on a four-game winning streak, leaving you in a quandary.
Do you invest emotionally in a team that wasted the first two months of the season and might be done by mid-January? Do you invest financially, in the form of tickets, car flags or party kegs, in a franchise that has made you scream more often than the IRS?
What you need, Mr. & Mrs. Helga Horns, is a plan, and here it is -- 10 ways to properly view and enjoy the Vikings' surprising success:
1. Erase the word "bandwagon" from your vocabulary: Anyone who speaks the word loses 10 points off their IQ, which is a problem, because anyone who speaks the word can't afford a 50 percent reduction.
A letter writer on the Star Tribune editorial pages chided fans who want to get back on the "bandwagon." First of all, does anyone even know what a bandwagon is? Isn't this a little anachronistic, like saying, "You ruffians stay off our horseless carriage or we'll call the constable?"
More to the point, anyone using the word assumes the NFL is like high school football, where you feel obligated to cheer for little Johnny who grew up next door.
Wrong. This isn't Buffalo. Minnesota offers four major sporting teams and a Big Ten university, not to mention plays, movies, high school sports and museums. It's not the average fan's job to offer emotional support to our millionaire athletes and billionaire owners; it's their job to win us over.