What is it about lakeside vacation homes, so picturesque with their lush forest backdrops, rustic boathouses and Pottery Barn decor, that makes them so ripe for the murdering?
Wes Craven filmed the original "The Last House on the Left" in 1972 (which was a remake of Ingmar Bergman's 1960 film "The Virgin Spring") and revolutionized the "when vacation's at bay, the killers will play" genre, which churns out summertime slasher films to this day. Craven isn't at the directorial helm this time around (it's Dennis Iliadis, guided by Craven), but this version retains major elements of his vicious original.
Seventeen-year-old Mari (Sara Paxton, the mermaid from "Aquamarine") and her parents are looking forward to a break at their secluded lake home. But good girl Mari and her annoyingly bubbly friend Paige get into a very sticky situation involving a veritable Manson family of traveling murderers led by charismatic prison escapee Krug (Garret Dillahunt). Like the Manson crew, they've got a sadistic Sadie (the Siamese-catlike Riki Lindhome, frequently topless) and delight in graphically torturing their victims, be they policemen or young girls.
When the killers leave Mari for dead within the lake's murky confines, they wind up as her parents' stormy-night guests. Luckily, champion swimmer Mari manages to make her way home, alerting her parents to the killers asleep in the guest house. Dr. and Mrs. Collingwood (Tony Goldwyn and Monica Potter) take matters (and axes) into their own hands.
"The Last House on the Left" is not for the faint of heart; it's gruesome, it's gory, there are stunts involving garbage disposals that are better left to the imagination. Plenty of blood is shed and too many bones are audibly broken. It's also uncomfortably sexual with gratuitous shots of Mari and Paige's tortured teenage bodies. An incredibly disturbing rape scene is drawn out far too long.
Sure, the movie is predictable (a convenient storm causes power outages and therefore the dark house is creepily candlelit and who knows who's lurking behind the door), but it keeps its audience on edge. Much of this is due to Iliadis' camera angles; he peers up from dark corners and frames his subjects in shadows to build tension. The acting lags whenever people aren't being clobbered by fire pokers; Paxton is a wet blanket, though Monica Potter as her mother has a lovely, expressive face even when she's plotting murder.
Kara Nesvig is a University of Minnesota student on assignment for the Star Tribune.
