Mark Craig's Week 17 picks: Something for everyone

'Tis the season to finish these stinkin' picks while requesting a government bailout for those who used them the past two weeks.

'Tis the season to look back on the careers of Rod and Romeo while looking forward to a XLIIIrd season without a Lions-Browns Super Bowl.

'Tis the season to add the combined December/January losses of Tony Romo while subtracting Wade Phillips from Dallas.

'Tis the season to guarantee there won't be a Denver/San Diego-Arizona Super Bowl. Then again, in this league, San Diego might become the first 8-8 team to win it all.

And, finally, 'tis the season to hand out some awards that aren't quite the same as the ones you'll see in a few weeks:

NYG +6 1/2 at MIN: Vikings by 3 To Adrian Peterson, the MVF. Most Valuable Fumbler.

OAK +13 at TB: Bucs by 10 To Al Davis, the Almost Lifetime Achievement Award. (We'll throw out the past 10 or 20 years.)

DAL +1 1/2 at PHI: Eagles by 6 To America's Team, the ESPY for Best Tragedy. To ESPN, the ESPY for having the ability to criticize a Cowboy and then sit down with him and ask, "Whaddaya think about all these critics?"

CHI +2 1/2 at HOU: Texans by 3 To Matt Schaub, the MVPWSWCSBJA. Most Valuable Player Whose Season Was Cut Short By Jared Allen. BTW, Schaub now shares Allen's opinion that a player's knees are sacred.

CAR -3 at NO: Saints by 7 To Drew Brees, a possible MVPTBDMRAMTP. Most Valuable Player To Break Dan Marino's Record And Miss the Playoffs.

STL +14 1/2 at ATL: Falcons by 7 To the Falcons, the Good Hands Award. They dug deep within themselves and somehow managed not to fumble seven times in a sterile, climate-controlled dome.

KC +3 at CIN: Bengals by 6 To the Chiefs, a one-way ticket to Ohio, where they would rank among the top three teams in the state.

TEN -3 at IND: Titans by 7 To LenDale White and Keith Bulluck, the "Are You Really Sure You Should Have Stomped On That Terrible Towel After Beating The Steelers?" award.

CLE +10 1/2 at PIT: Steelers by 42 To S. Claus, a lifetime ban from Mike Tomlin's news conferences. To Mike Tomlin, a spot in the Pennsylvania division of Santa's list, right next to those snowball-throwing Eagles fans.

NE -6 1/2 at BUF: Patriots by 10 To the Patriots, "Most Dominating Performance Against A Super Bowl Host City's Team The Year After Going 16-0 And Blowing The Super Bowl."

SEA +6 at ARI: Cardinals by 7 To the Cardinals, "Best Cameo Appearance In A Snowstorm By A Disinterested Warm Weather Team That Had Already Clinched A Playoff Spot."

WAS +3 at SF: 49ers by 6 To the 49ers, the "Don't Get Too Excited, You're Still A Sub-.500 Team In The NFC West" award.

MIA +3 at NYJ: Dolphins 24, Jets 21 To Brett Favre, a Pro Bowl berth that should have gone to Chad Pennington. To Pennington, more chances to beat the Jets after Favre turns 40 and/or retires.

Last week: Panthers 20, Giants 17 Result: Giants 34, Panthers 28 Season: 9-7

SEASON TRACKER

Last week 5-11 /7-9 vs. spread