Just call him Mr. Manners

Golden Valley dad Ira Hackner is on a mission to teach kids how to behave politely and respect others.

July 23, 2010 at 8:20PM
Ira Hackner, creator of the "Kids Good Manners" DVD, with children from the Heidi Bloom Family Child Care. Clockwise from bottom left: Nat Nelson, 5; Tyler Hackner, 8; Brady Huynh, 5, and Breanna Huynh, 3.
Ira Hackner, creator of the “Kids Good Manners” DVD, with children from the Heidi Bloom Family Child Care. Clockwise from bottom left: Nat Nelson, 5; Tyler Hackner, 8; Brady Huynh, 5, and Breanna Huynh, 3. (Star Tribune/The Minnesota Star Tribune)

Those darn kids these days. No manners. No respect for others.

When Golden Valley's Ira Hackner started having these thoughts a few years back, he had two choices: He could devolve into a "get off my lawn" coot -- or he could do something about it.

He chose the latter course, and now his "Kids Good Manners" DVD is spreading the gospel of propriety and protocol at hundreds of schools and day care centers.

"The kids love it, and it reinforces what we try to teach," said day care provider Heidi Bloom, who estimates that she has screened the DVD at least 50 times at her Crystal day care center. "And it has an immediate effect. They try to behave. They also call each other out. They love doing that."

Hackner, 51, the father of 8-year-old Tyler, designed the video to teach rather than preach, to deliver some serious ideas in a not-so-serious format.

"Making it fun was very important," he said.

So after getting feedback from teachers and day care workers, he hired local kids to act out situations and local writers to provide entertaining multiple-choice questions.

"The kids love the game-show format," Bloom said. "And the part on table manners, where a boy is making a big mess with his food, they love that, too."

Since Hackner released the DVD in 2007, it has attracted enough interest and required enough attention that his job as a software applications consultant has taken a back seat for the modern-day Mr. Manners. The DVD is available in about 500 Target stores and at his website (www.kidsgoodmanners.com, $15.98 shipped).

Besides table manners, the topics include etiquette for the phone, sports and being a guest or host for friends, plus respect for other people's property. The chipper but polite (of course) Hackner has started working on a script for a follow-up DVD with more of an "out and about" theme: school, movies, special occasions, visits to relatives and even what to do about bullying.

"I was just concerned that parents didn't have time or find the time to teach their kids proper manners," he said. "And kids get the wrong messages in movies, TV and print."

He added that the DVD targets ages 4 to 11. That fits with Bloom's experience.

"After lunch, we watch a movie every day, and let the kids choose it," she said. "The older kids, they often pick that one."

Bill Ward • 612-673-7643

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BILL WARD

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