Jim Souhan: Laughingstock Lions won't be lousy much longer

At 0-2, desperate for a victory, with their passing game demonstrating all the rhythm of a drunken polka band, the Vikings are catching the Detroit Lions at just the right time.

On a Sunday.

The worst Midwestern franchise this side of the Timberwolves will play in the Metrodome on Sunday, and the Vikings may leave a trail of rose petals between the Lions' hotel and the stadium, just to make sure they show up on time.

In a sink-or-swim league, the Lions have long been the Vikings' water wings. Sunday, the Vikes have the privilege of facing a should-lose team in a must-win game.

Where would the Vikings be without the Lions? Bud Grant (26-8-1 against Detroit) might not be in the Hall of Fame. Mike Tice (8-0 against the Lions) wouldn't have kept his job so long. Brad Childress (7-1 against Detroit) would have a lower approval rating than house mold.

The Lions are to the Vikings what the curtain was to the Wizard of Oz.

Here's the problem for The Purple: This might be the last day for a long time they can treat the Lions like kitty litter.

A change is gonna come. Maybe soon.

The Vikings currently rely on a 40-year-old quarterback who says he's retiring after the season, and who will have no choice but to quit if he keeps playing like this.

And on a soon-to-be 38-year-old nose tackle, Pat Williams, whose age is no longer such a small fraction of his waistline.

And on a running back, Adrian Peterson, who takes a fearsome beating every week.

And on a guard, Steve Hutchinson, who is soon to turn 33. And a cornerback, Antoine Winfield, who already did.

The Vikings are desperate to win this year. The Lions are building toward something that Matt Millen couldn't have envisioned in all the minutes he spent contemplating his job as Lions general manager.

That something is a future.

The Lions are building with all the right I-beams.

At the skill positions, with quarterback Matthew Stafford, receiver Calvin Johnson and running back Jah- vid Best.

On the defensive line, with No. 1 pick Ndamukong Suh and free-agent signee Kyle Vanden Bosch.

The Vikings had a chance to draft Best, whom Gophers fans will remember as the impossible-to-tackle back from Cal. Instead, the Vikings traded down and chose Stanford running back Toby Gerhart, in part because the Vikings were worried about Best's concussion history.

Best might cause the Vikings' brass concussion problems, from slapping themselves in the forehead.

At this point, most teams would rather have the speedy Best, who has already scored five touchdowns and who could wind up looking like Reggie Bush if he doesn't become an every-down back.

If you were to bet on Sunday's game, you'd want to take the veteran team, playing at home, desperate for a victory, with future Hall of Famers at quarterback, running back, guard and perhaps defensive end.

If you were to bet on the future of this rivalry, you might want to take a flier on the heretofore woebegone Lions.