Here's the rub

Mother Mary dishes on her famous massage clients.

January 9, 2009 at 4:05AM

BEST BODY

Men under 50: Chris Daughtry

Over 50: Bruce Springsteen, Paul Stanley ("He's sculpted.")

Women: Sarah McLachlan, Sheryl Crow

SHORTER THAN EXPECTED

Kenny Chesney, Shania Twain

TALLER THAN EXPECTED

James Taylor

MOST UNEXPECTED

Avril Lavigne ("She was quieter and very gentle."); Marilyn Manson ("He was totally normal, not in makeup, totally respectable.")

MOST SERIOUS

Sting, James Taylor

LEAST SERIOUS

Mickey Rooney

MOST SPIRITUAL

Ravi Shankar, Michael W. Smith

BIGGEST TIPPER

Axl Rose. "I got paid till 4 a.m. and he didn't even get a massage."

JON BREAM

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The "winners" have all been Turkeys, no matter the honor's name.

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