It was devastating to learn that Santa Claus didn't exist and that babies didn't come from the same dude who peddled pickles, but finding out that the great Johnny Carson, the smoothest guy on my TV set, wasn't as debonair in his personal life?
Childhood is officially over.
It's always heartbreaking to discover that your heroes are fallible creatures, which may be reason enough to avoid watching the latest "Johnny Carson: King of Late Night," an "American Masters" production airing on PBS Monday, 50 years after Carson took over NBC's "The Tonight Show" and 20 years after his retirement.
While this thorough, two-hour documentary is packed with praise -- nearly 50 interviewees pay their respects -- one theme might rattle die-hard fans: Johnny had mommy issues.
"For his entire life, he tried to get her approval and her love and she withheld it, no matter what he did," writer and co-director Peter Jones said in an interview earlier this year, referring to Carson's mother, Ruth.
In the movie's most devastating anecdote, we learn that a Time correspondent doing a cover story on Carson in 1965 watched the opening monologue with Johnny's mother in her living room. After it was done, she stood up and said, "That wasn't funny," and walked into the kitchen.
No wonder the late-night host got divorced three times.
"His whole life, his relationship with women, was really defined by that principal relationship with his mother," Jones said. "None of the marriages ever worked and it was one of his deepest regrets."