This is an indelicate matter, and probably not fit for the breakfast table. Then again, I'm quoting the paper, which we read Thursday morn at the breakfast table: "'Team Diarrhea' helped state crack salmonella case."
Good morning! More Cocoa Puffs?
Said the article: "A gee-whiz state lab, investigators dubbed 'Team Diarrhea' and a unique approach to sleuthing illness contributed to the breakthrough." They discovered it was jalapenos that caused the recent salmonella outbreak - and yes, I know, you wonder how they control for such an experiment.
The FDA had pointed the federal finger at tomatoes, and this led to the great Love-Apple Panic of Ought-Eight; you expected the government to send out crop-dusters full of bismuth to spray any neighborhood where people had a BLT. Our plucky scientists found the true culprit, though, and deserve the thanks of a grateful nation. Without those six flecks of tomato on a fast-food taco, some people didn't get vegetables at all.
The reason I bring this up - aside from the general lack of amusing news in this nervous, worried summer - is the name of the group that tracked the bug: TEAM DIARRHEA. It was just an odd thing to see in a newspaper headline. It's one of those moments when you know the culture has shifted a bit. My child was stunned to see that word in the headline - they said diarrhea? In the paper? Team Diarrhea?
If you have a Pokemon enthusiast in the house, you'll never look at Team Rocket's signature exit line the same way.
Perhaps you had the same reaction, and had a momentary pang of regret over the decline of prudish euphemisms.
Or perhaps you think that's nonsense - why, the ability to talk frankly about simple human facts is a sign of maturity, and only the adolescent temperament thinks it's funny. I suppose you were one of those kids who snickered when the substitute teacher said Mr. Johnson had slipped and cracked his coccyx. Now open your books and we will learn about Lake Titicaca. Guilty as charged.
