Film fest must not be a snoozer

Dear Mr. Smithee: I teach at a small community/technical college. I wanted to start a film series, so I polled my fellow faculty members and asked them, "What films do you believe your students should see before they leave college?"

The 10 films receiving the most votes, and thus becoming the first film series, were "The Mission," "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" "Schindler's List," "Duck Soup," "Monty Python's The Meaning of Life," "Rear Window," "Twelve Angry Men," "Saving Private Ryan," "The Wizard of Oz" and "O Brother, Where Art Thou?"

I launched the film series. The students stayed away in droves. I had to cancel mid-way through. I'd like to try again. And so I turn to you. Why do you think these films were snakebitten? What would you suggest for a film series at a small, two-year college?

PATRICK SPRADLIN, BRAINERD, MINN.

Dear Ya, Sure, Ya Betcha: Why do you think Hollywood turns out mountains of pure cinematic drivel?

It is because, quite simply, it is the kind of material that will lure in young minds. What you have here is a failure to communicate. Perhaps you trusted that college students were interested in learning something new.

Think of it this way. You, a fine young college student, finally ask the school's most beautiful coed for a date. You say, "Hey, let's go see a long movie about 18th-century Jesuits hacking their way through the jungles of South America."

If you are going to book something as dense as "The Mission," at least be prepared to put up signs that read, "FILM SERIES. FREE BEER."

I might suggest that you try not only to educate your otherwise occupied students but to imagine what might be their personal interests and work from that to attain a crowd.

Here are 10 films to consider -- and why:

"Hard Candy" (2005): Before she made "Juno," Ellen Page performed admirably in a hard-hitting revenge drama involving a pedophile (Patrick Wilson). It's tough as nails and can spark a lively post-screening discussion.

"Monster's Ball" (2001): Not because it's an important and interesting movie (which it is), but because you will market it by playing up the facts that the Heath Ledger co-stars and that it's directed by Marc Forster, whose latest film is the upcoming James Bond thriller "Quantum of Solace."

"Napoleon Dynamite" (2004): Don't forget to hold a "Tina, come get some ham!" eating contest.

"The Descent" (2006): Who cares that it's only two years old? It's a fine horror film. Take a hint from William Castle's playbook. Require moviegoers to chain one leg to a chair and make promotional signs that read, "So much scarier than 'Saw' you will cut your foot off to get out alive!"

"Go" (1999): The marketing plan: "See Katie Holmes before she was abducted!"

"The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring" (2001), "Two Towers" (2002) and "The Return of the King" (2003): Be smart. Show the extended versions. Do it in a marathon. Anybody who makes it all the way through all three films gets an A in the college course of their choice.

"Suicide Club" (2002): Every festival needs a foreign film. This cult favorite from Japan begins with 54 giggling teenage schoolgirls jumping in unison toward a speeding subway train. Blood, gore and smart filmmaking ensue.

ALAN