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Alan Smithee: If you're ever stranded on a desert island ...

June 13, 2008 at 10:06PM

Dear Mr. Smithee: Your recent comments on "The Wizard of Oz" were really terrific. My 16- and 19-year-olds think that "Oz" is a yawner and won't watch it with me, though I'll submit to "The Lord of the Rings," "Harry Potter," et al.

"Oz" is one of the 10 that I'd take if stranded on an island.

Anyway, I have a question that's driving me nuts. You're the wizard, so it's probably a no-brainer for you. I can't remember who said, "It must be nice to be the smartest person in the room" -- or something like that. I think it was Spacey or Macy.

JIM NELSON, MINNETONKA

Dear Lollipop Guild: It appears to me you neglected your children's education. Apparently, you must have failed to indoctrinate your children with ample viewings of "The Wizard of Oz" in their once-wee years.

But I also advise hopeful feelings. I recall that my once wee-sons, D.W. and Cecil B., were dutifully shown "The Bicycle Thief" in their wee years. They made fun of that movie for years.

Only now, as adults, have they come forward to say: "Dad, you were right. It is a great movie."

As for your question, the line you speak of is spoken in "Broadcast News" by Peter Hackes, an NBC News correspondent who appeared in the film.

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Here is what he says to Jane Craig, played by Holly Hunter: "It must be nice to always believe you know better, to always think you're the smartest person in the room."

What matters most, my friend, is Jane's response. It is perfect.

Her reply: "No. It's awful."

Believe me, I understand her completely.

ALAN

P.S. You get a "Get Smart" T-shirt and a "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" T-shirt.

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P.P.S. You mention something in your letter that no one has ever inquired about before -- 10 movies you'd take with you to a deserted island. These would be mine:

1 "To Kill a Mockingbird." Because it's my favorite movie.

2 "The Godfather." Because it's the best movie ever made.

3 "The Godfather, Part II." Because if it's not the best movie ever made, it's the second best.

4 "The Lion in Winter." Because I am consistently amazed by the perfect dialogue and perfect performances.

5 "Some Like It Hot." Because from time to time, I'll want to laugh.

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6 "Miracle." Because it honors a moment in time when I felt extremely happy.

7 "Reconstruction." Because it's the most complicated romance movie I've ever seen.

8 "North by Northwest." Because it's Hitchcock, and it exudes adventure.

9 "The Empire Strikes Back." Because it's my favorite "Star Wars" movie.

10 "The Shawshank Redemption." Just because.

This one's a gamble Dear Mr. Smithee: I am always amazed by how right on the mark your lists of "bests" and "worsts" are.

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With the growing popularity of televised poker and other gambling, which do you consider the best movies that deal with the subject of gambling?

Two come to mind, both with Paul Newman: "The Hustler" and "The Color of Money."

What others do you feel make the list?

GARRY GIERLICZ, WELLINGTON, FLA.

Dear Omaha Hi/Lo: Let me be very clear about one thing: Poker on television is wonderful because you get to see everyone's hole cards, which gives insight into their thinking and game.

Poker in movies is, generally, a complete bore because so much time is spent explaining what is happening and why. Plus, with the game being part of the written screenplay, real-life poker players can fairly quickly determine a hand's outcome.

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As far as movies prominently featuring gambling, I like these (in no particular order): "Rounders," "The Hustler," "House of Games," "Hard Eight," "Bob le Flambeur," "Croupier," "The Killing," "Lost in America," "The Deer Hunter" and, sometimes just for kicks, "Vegas Vacation."

ALAN

P.S. You get a set of "Kung Fu Panda" play figurines.

Is there really an Alan Smithee? That's one he won't answer. But he does allow that it's a name used for crediting purposes when directors want to disassociate themselves from a movie that, well, stinks. E-mail him at alansmithee@ajc.com. Include your name, city and daytime phone number.

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