THE BUZZ Ozzie Guillen said of his White Sox when they went out west 1 1/2 weeks ago: "If we play bad, people don't have to watch us." Now sub in "Gardy" and "Twins."

REMOTE PATROL If you insist on staying up to watch the Twins, the first of a week's worth of late-night games is tonight at Safeco Field in Seattle (9 p.m., FSN).

Click pick ESPN writer Paul Lukas' excellent Uni Watch blog (uniwatchblog.com) hits its fifth birthday this week; the website obsesses over all things related to uniforms.

STAR GAZING Chad Ochocinco -- I thought he was going back to Johnson? -- risked his NFL career by making $10,000 to spend 1.5 seconds riding a bull Saturday.

FAST FACT After being disparaged by their manager, the White Sox went 6-3 out west and no longer reside in last place ... that's where the Twins are now.