When you weren't typing FIRE MATURI in all-caps, you might have noticed that the new Gophers football coach has the last name of "kill." This will be a headline writer's dream -- and could often be a fan's worst nightmare.

Here, then, is our guide to effectively using Jerry Kill's last name cleverly -- and not overusing it with things that are unfunny, don't make sense, or make us want to strangle you. We will provide no context as to why. These things should just be instinctive:


*Calling TCF Bank Stadium, "The Killing Field."

*Creating a special Jerry Kill "fatality," a la Mortal Kombat, that features him wearing a "Kill" t-shirt and chopping off the head of a fictional badger with an axe at the end of Gophers victories over Wisconsin.


Everything else. That includes "A Time To Kill," "Killing Me Softly," "kill shot," etc.

You can use the comments to persuade us to add to the first list.

Older Post

Monday (The Grand Forks chronicles: Who is Brett Favre?) edition: Wha' Happened?

Newer Post

TFD: Please enjoy this Twitter video war between Chris Kluwe and Brian Robison