We've started a new feature here at VikesCentric for the hotly awaited 2013 preseason (also known as the NFL's annual festival of gouging season-ticket holders by charging full price for a glorified scrimmage). We're calling it "Four Who Flashed" because "flashing" is our favorite preseason football cliché. No, it has nothing to do with Dino Ciccarelli (but just to be safe, don't read this with your garage door open). It's a buzzword used by the likes of Mike Mayock to describe a player who showed tremendous ability on the football field, perhaps even rising beyond expectations to merit extra attention. And we're limiting it to the preseason because in the regular season we'd have to call it "Adrian Peterson and Three Other Guys" – though we discussed tweaking it in Week 1 and calling it "While You Were Having Your Breath Taken Away by Adrian Peterson" to highlight the work of one of the less-heralded 52 Vikings. Honestly, we're still workshopping it. Stay tuned.
So without further delay, here are the Four Who Flashed on Sunday night against the Niners:
1. Adrian Peterson – Yep, he flashed onto the field for two plays and then flashed right back to the sideline. But anybody who feels cheated or misled by his short appearance – or anybody who's offended they even bothered to play him – needs to understand the relationship between the NFL and its broadcast partners. The tail truly wags the dog here. NBC knows its only hope of drawing a rating higher than a Packer fan's BAC is to hype the presence of the NFL MVP. Al Michaels and Cris Collinsworth spent half of their intro segment talking about Peterson. They had an extended interview with him to pimp at halftime. They can't sell the significance of an insignificant game if the one guy they're talking about spends the entire night on the sidelines. Yeah, they're insulting the intelligence of their audience if they think we'd be fooled into thinking Peterson would play a huge role in the game. But then again, what is the NFL preseason if not a giant insult to our collective intelligence?
2. NFL officials – They're in midseason form. No need for more preseason work – they'll get repetitive stress injuries in their flag-throwing elbows. Yeah, you can point the gnarly finger of blame at the players, who made their fair share of bonehead plays (looking at you, Lavelle Hawkins), but 17 penalties for 193 yards seemed a bit excessive. Those two personal foul calls on Matt Kalil especially carried the distinct stench of officials trying to "set the tone" by calling any ticky-tack infraction they see. I guess the lesson here is, if a guy touches you, make sure you fall down and let your limbs flail about in a comical fashion. That's the recipe for a sure 15 yards in the NFL of 2013.
3. Josh Robinson – Well, he didn't exactly flash the way he'd want to flash, but he probably memorized the names of all the 49ers' wide receivers given how much time he spent looking at the backs of their jerseys all night. It was a rather troubling performance from the man the Vikings hope will replace Antoine Winfield at the slot corner position, especially given the injury concerns with Chris Cook and the learning curve for rookie Xavier Rhodes. Let's just say that if Robinson doesn't turn things around quickly, opposing quarterbacks will be looking to see wherever No. 21 is lining up on every play.
4. Those wacky 49ers fans – It's not often that a team's security staff has to call in reinforcements to keep spectators from staging their own track meet on the field. Fortunately, the SFPD had more success keeping fans off the field than they did catching the Zodiac killer, but it's still kind of embarrassing when Jerome Simpson makes the biggest tackle of the night for the Purple. Of course, NBC refused to show us what happened when the sacred field was invaded, so even though Michaels and Collinsworth basically gave us a play-by-play of the action on the field, our tender psyches were spared visual proof that some fans are occasionally overserved and wind up making fools of themselves. Yes, even NBC is in midseason pearl-clutching form.
So what will you remember most about Game 3 of the eagerly awaited 2013 Vikings preseason? We'll take your comments below.
Patrick Donnelly is a Senior Editor at SportsData, a contributor to the Vikings Yearbook, and has covered the Vikings for FOXSportsNorth.com, Viking Update and the Associated Press. Follow him on Twitter at @donnelly612.