Waiting is the hardest part

Pre-game shows. Fantasy football. Reading a book. Reading the newspaper. And even two gloriously incongruent activities -- exercising and making a huge breakfast -- can be part of the attempt to make the cursed time melt away so that noon will arrive faster.

With that in mind, let us tell you (and we probably don't even have to tell you, dear football fan): Sunday was the perfect storm of imperfect circumstances. It was enough to drive a fan of either the Vikings or Packers into a time-killing machine.

First, of course, every Vikings/Packers game is huge. Second, the magnitude of this game ramped up the very second Brett Favre signed with the Vikings. That anticipation built throughout this week as stories were written, angles were dissected and, apparently, funerals for Favre were held.

Next, there was the dreaded 3:15 p.m. time slot -- a switch announced weeks back. Sure, football itself started at noon. Even if you can't get the NFL Sunday Ticket -- thanks, DirecTV monopoly! -- there were two games to at least bridge the gap. But unless you have an emotional attachment to another game, this appetizer football only satisfies for so long. Around the middle of the third quarter, when every game seems as though it's going to last forever, the fidgeting gets even worse.

Completing the perfect storm: daylight savings. Yes, this was the fall Sunday when we turned the clocks back. An extra hour of sleep, you say? An extra hour to wait for the game, we say. Because really, there isn't much worse than congratulating yourself for sleeping later than usual, thus dreaming away minutes that would have been otherwise torturous, only to realize you are an hour further from your goal (and will also now be coming home from work in the dark, no matter what).

We'll spare you the details of everything we did Sunday from 9 a.m. until 3:15. But at least we could write this. Otherwise, who knows what might have happened.

MICHAEL RAND