Peterson? Never heard of him

The Patriots are trying go 7-0 for the first time in team history. The Colts are looking for their third consecutive 6-0 start. And the Dolphins have asked Joel Maturi if he knows whether Miami of Ohio has an open date.

Meanwhile, in the Pee Wee Confer ... I mean the NFC, the Cowboys will try to become the first 6-1 team. They'll have to stop Adrian Peterson, who I thought was really, really good, only to find out he's actually a combination of Eric Dickerson, Gale Sayers, Earl Campbell, Marshall Faulk, Emmitt Smith, the Road Runner, Stretch Armstrong, the Incredible Hulk and GI Joe with the Kung Fu Grip.

Good luck stopping him, Cowboys. (Or, better yet, just utilize the rule legalizing the forward pass.)

MN +9½ at DAL: Cowboys by 17

Peterson also shows glimpses of Spider-Man, Plastic Man, Rocky Balboa and Godzilla, but with a much quicker first step.

ARI +8 at WAS: Redskins by 15

Tim Rattay? Tim Hasselbeck? Is it me or did the Cardinals' playoff hopes just go TIM-ber!

ATL +9 at NO: Saints by 3

Joey Harrington is 2-0 lifetime against the Saints. So if my math's right, he's 0-Infinity against the rest of the league. And, oh yeah, he's back on the bench.

BAL -3 at BUF: Bills by 3

K Rian Lindell took O.J. Simpson's fifth-place rank on the Bills' career scoring list. O.J. and his posse plan to take it back.

NE -16½ at MIA: Patriots by 14

The world hasn't seen a home underdog like this since George Washington played QB for the Continental Army.

SF +9½ at NYG: Giants by 6

The 49ers have won 10 of the past 13 meetings. But the Giants have won four in a row since about when ESPN reported that Eli Manning's arm fell off.

TB +2 at DET: Buccaneers by 7

Dear Lions Prez Matt Millen and Bucs GM Bruce Allen: The clavicle seems to be doing just fine since draft day. Your friend, A. Peterson.

TEN off at HOU: Texans by 7

The Titans have won five of their past six road games. Yeah, but that was when we had some sort of guarantee that Kerry Collins wouldn't be putting his helmet on.

KC +3 at OAK: Raiders by 6

As a starter, Daunte Culpepper's home teams are 9-2 in October. Of course, now that he isn't a Viking, he no longer plays in front of the NFL's Loudest Sound System.

NYJ +6 at CIN: Bengals by 3

Is it me, or were the Bengals a lot better back when they were always getting arrested?

CHI +5 at PHI: Eagles by 7

Chicago native Donovan McNabb is 4-0 against the Bears. The Bears don't care. They just ask that he not show up wearing a purple jersey with No. 28 on it.

STL +9 at SEA: Seahawks by 3

Say what you want about one of my surprise teams, but are the Rams not the best 0-6 team that ranks last in turnover ratio and scoring?

PIT -3½ at DEN: Broncos by 6

If I admit I like John Madden, does that make me a fuddy-duddy who doesn't need animated robots or former players yelling "JACK YOU UP!" to enjoy a game?

UPSET SPECIAL

IND -3 at JAX: Jaguars by 7

Yeah, the Colts have won 10 consecutive games, counting the 2006 postseason. Yeah, Peyton Manning is 8-2 on "Monday Night Football." Yeah, I'm nuts for picking against them ...

Last week's pick: MIN by 2 over CHI. Result: MIN 34, CHI 31. Record: 3-3

SEASON TRACKER

Last week

9-4/6-5-2 vs. spread

Season record

52-36/39-42-7 vs. spread