Jim Souhan analyzes the local sports scene and advises you to never take his betting advice. He likes old guitars and old music, never eats press box hot dogs, and can be heard on 1500ESPN at 2:05 p.m. weekdays, and Sundays from 10 a.m.-noon.
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This is why we love the NFL, for its unpredictability and drama.
This is why workplace productivity takes such a hit on Mondays following the Sundays when the local NFL team loses.
At different times during the Vikings' 31-30 loss to Chicago, I expected Christian Ponder to be benched, Devin Hester to return every kick for a touchdown, Adrian Peterson to be ground into dust, and Jay Cutler to get extremely hot and dominate the game.
Instead, Ponder settled down after an awful first half and played the way he did last December, the Vikings' defense and special teams produce countless big plays and the Vikings set themselves up to win an almost-must-win game at a place where they hardly ever play well, Soldier Field.
Most interesting, they put themselves in position to win without a big game from Adrian Peterson, who outperformed most mortals but was hardly his dominating self because of the Bears' attentive defense and the slippery turf.
Then Jay Cutler hit Martellus Bennett with a touchdown pass with 10 seconds left, and the Vikings suddenly were staring into the abyss, at 0-2.
Again, that's why we love the NFL, and so many of you hate Mondays. Games and seasons can swing in a matter of minutes.
Teams that return a kickoff and a fumble for a touchdown in the same game have lost only 12 times since 1940. While Ponder played much better in the second half, his inability to take advantage of a Bears defense stacked to stop the run in the first half may have been the deciding factor.
OK, since I used my column to hammer Christian Ponder for an awful performance and not taking full responsibility for that performance, I"ll offer a positive thought in this space:
The Vikings' receivers are greatly improved.
Greg Jennings made two fine catches on poorly-thrown balls. Cordarrelle Patterson, in just a couple of cameos, showed off an impressive burst and cutting ability. Jerome Simpson looks like a new man. Jarius Wright, highly-praised in training camp, should be a worthwhile fourth option.
Given that Ponder looked so inaccurate and indecisive, the Vikings would be wise to emphasize a couple of the simplest routes a quarterback is asked to throw: The behind-the-line screen to the wideout that would showcase Patterson's skills, and the deep routes that allow a receiver to adjust to even poorly-thrown balls.
Patterson could emulate Harvin in the short passing game, and Simpson made two fine catches on less-than-perfect downfield throws on Sunday.
When asked to make multiple reads and find an open receiver, Ponder looked terrible.
It's silly to call for the starting quarterback's job after one game. So I'll wait a week.
I heard about Randy Moss saying, jokingly or not, that the Vikings were being disrespectful by allowing Cordarrelle Patterson to wear No. 84.
This from the king of disrepectfulness.
I might actually take Moss seriously if he didn't treat just about everybody badly.
This is the guy who, given free food in the lockerroom by a local caterer, said he wouldn't feed that food to his dog. (I've eaten at that restaurant. Great stuff.) This is a guy who, after being paid by the Vikings in a game in which he gave up on a catchable deep pass from Brett Favre, went to the Vikings' podium in New England's stadium and praised the Patriots.
I could give you far worse examples of his behaviour, but I wouldn't be able to quote him accurately, so I'll leave it to your imagination.
He's a classless jerk. A tremendous player, but a classless jerk.
This is a pet peeve of mine, TV stations giving jobs to athletes and coaches who were terrible with the media during their careers. Shannon Sharpe and Moss might be the two worst examples.
Congratulations to Lindsay Whalen on her contract extension.
She's all class and a great player. What a couple of years: Comes back to her hometown team, wins a WNBA title, plays an unexpectedly large role on an Olympic champion, and signs an extension.
I'll be on WJON in St. Cloud at 7:05 a.m. then on with Judd&Dubay on 1500ESPN at noon tomorrow.
While there are many ways to analyze a draft, here's the way I look at Rick Spielman's moves the last two years: He positioned himself to land five players in the first round. The first two, Matt Kalil and Harrison Smith, are very good players at positions of great need. The three Spielman took on Thursday could be just a valuable.
I'll be honest, Florida State cornerback Xavier Rhodes is the biggest mystery for me. The Vikings have not fared well when drafting cornerbacks. The Asher Allen experiment was particularly troubling. Chris Cook hasn't fulfilled his potential yet. Josh Robinson is talented but needs to make progress this year. The Vikings need Rhodes to be a starter, replacing Antoine Winfield.
The other two picks, I think, are perfect for this team. Sharrif Floyd should start in Game 1, and should be the kind of active defensive tackle the Vikings need, at the second-most important position (defensive line) in football. I believe the Vikings when they say they had no idea he could fall to them at No. 23.
And Cordarrelle Patterson is a fascinating pick. He's big and fast, can return kicks and punts, and I think will be able to both play Percy Harvin's old role in the offense and be a deep threat on the outside. He's not polished, but the Vikings rely heavily on receivers coach George Stewart, and he has a lot to work with in Patterson.
Covering the draft is such a strange journalistic experience. Nobody can say for certain which players will be good and which won't. We can't ever forget that Joe Montana went in the third round and Tom Brady in the sixth, and that some draft analysts favored Ryan Leaf over Peyton Manning.
But, as I wrote in my Friday column, Spielman has done very well with first-round picks, which tells me the more time he spends studying a player, the better Vikings fans should feel.
I wasn't thrilled with the Harvin trade or the team's willingness to lose Winfield, but Thursday's decisions could lessen the impact of those losses.
I'll be on WJON in St. Cloud at 7:15 a.m. and 1500ESPN at noon tomorrow to discuss the draft and other stuff. Please follow me on Twitter at @Souhanstrib.
Doug Mientkiewicz wanted to add one thing to our conversation that was the basis of today's column: ``My biggest regret in baseball is that we didn't win a World Series when I was with the Twins. We thought we would.''
On to today's Local Power Ranking of the seven local revenue sports, which have shifted since the last time I did them:
1. Gopher men's hockey
This team is skilled enough to win the national title. Is it tough enough?
2. Minnesota Wild
I'm quite impressed with the way Mike Yeo has melded incoming stars, holdover veterans and promising youngsters. He's gone from hot seat to coach of the year candidate in my book. Ryan Suter has played brilliantly ever since his first two, quite nervous, weeks in a Wild uni.
3. Minnesota Vikings
Didn't like seeing a team in a passing league lose its only dynamic receiver and best cornerback, but Rick Spielman has a chance to make his plan work. If he can complement Greg Jennings with another quality receiver or two (I vote for Cal's Keenan Allen and one more free-agent pickup), the offense could be better, and if he can use the draft to land a couple of defensive starters, the defense could be more talented.
His plan will only be as good as his execution.
4. Gopher basketball
I'm rooting for Minnesota facing VCU in the first round. Tubby vs. Shaka Smart. Tubby vs. the man who should replace him. Bring it on, please.
5. Minnesota Twins
I'm encouraged by a handful of individuals in spring camp, but not by the pitching staff, and the pitching staff will determine this team's fate.
6. Minnesota Timberwolves
I love the way Ricky Rubio has played, knowing the season is lost and his teammates aren't good enough.
7. Gopher football
Jerry Kill is 4-12 in the Big Ten. Facts are so annoying.
Some numbers produced during what might have been the best football game I've seen in the Metrodome:
-Finished with 199 yards and the second-best rushing total in NFL history, 2,097 yards. Eric Dickerson retains the record of 2,105. Peterson was nine yards shy. ``I know Eric Dickerson is stoked,'' Peterson said with a smile.
-Set an NFL record for most rushing yards in December, with 861. Clinton Page of Devner had 672 in 2002.
-Set an NFL record for most rushing yards in any month. Chris Johnson of Tennessee had 800 in 2009. (Month not provided.)
-Tied an NFL record for most 150-plus yard rushing games in a season, with 7. He's tied with Earl Campbell, who did it in 1980.
-Set a team record for most rushing attempts in a game, with 34.
-Matt Kalil tied a record for most starts by a rookie tackle, at 16, with Todd Steussie.
-Blair Walsh tied an NFL record for most field goals made in a season by a rookie, with 35. Ali Haji-Sheikh of the Giants did it in 1983.
-Walsh finished the regular season with 141 points, most ever by a Vikings rookie and second among Vikings kickers all-time to Gary Anderson's 164 points in 1998.
-Walsh tied a team record for most field goals made in a season, with 35. Anderson had 35 in '98.
-Walsh set an NFL record for highest field-goal percentage in a season by a rookie, with 92.1. Richie Cunningham of Dallas had a 91.9 percent in 1997.
-Walsh set an NFL record for most 50-plus yard field goals made by a rookie in a season, with 10.
-Christian Ponder became only the sixth Vikings quarterback to start 16 games in a season. The others: Brett Favre, Daunte Culpepper (3 times), Warren Moon, Tommy Kramer, Fran Tarkenton.
Tale of two teams:
The Packers finished the season with 4,049 net yards passing. The Vikings had 2,751.
The Packers finished the season with 1,702 net yards passing. The Vikings had 2,634.
They wound up one game apart in the standings.
Yes, I do think Frazier is the coach of the year. The Colts tanked on purpose last year, and were rewarded with one of the most advanced rookie quarterbacks of all time. The Vikings won three games on merit, while winning just enough to lose a chance to draft Luck or Griffin, and improved by seven games.
I also think Peterson is the MVP. As much as I revere Peyton Manning, he took over a team that won a playoff game last year. He improved the offense dramatically but stepped into a great situation. Peterson was the dojminant figure on an offense with few alternatives, and he performed even better once Percy Harvin went out.
As frequent readers know, I don't champion locals unless I think they're deserving. I think Frazier and Peterson are deserving.
I'll be on WJON in St. Cloud at 7:15 a.m. and 1500ESPN at 2:05 p.m. tomorrow. Please follow me on Twitter at @Souhanstrib.
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