Michael Rand started RandBall with hopes that he could convince the world to love jumpsuits as much as he does. So far, he's only succeeded in using the word "redacted" a lot. He welcomes suggestions, news tips, links of pure genius, and pictures of pets in Halloween costumes here, though he already knows he will regret that last part.

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Posts about Professional baseball

Monday (So, what did we miss?) edition: Wha' Happened?

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: April 14, 2014 - 9:46 AM

 

So, as some of you might have noticed, we haven't posted in these parts for a while. And as some of you might know, the reason is pretty simple: we had two weeks off after the March 30 birth of our first child, a daughter named Anabel.

 

She arrived after a somewhat lengthy process, but she did arrive right on her due date -- which also happens to be the same birthday as our wife Julie (aka the RandBall Better Half). She is healthy, sweet, and generally good-mannered (both of them are, we suppose), though Anabel did have her first rough night last night by keeping us up until about 3 a.m. with unexplained crying.

Babies are going to do baby things.

The past couple weeks have been somewhat of a blur. They also happened to be two pretty crazy weeks of sports. As such, here are very brief recaps of what we missed out on posting on, even if we barely remember a lot of it happening:

*UConn won the NCAA men's hoops title; the Gophers won the NIT title. Wisconsin lost in the Final Four. We were watching "Say Yes to the Dress" in the hospital during a couple of Elite 8 games since the person delivering the baby gets the remote, so don't come back to us for much more insight than that. (Side note: What is the point of that show? Nobody wins anything. There's not really a host. It's just basically watching people shop for a wedding dress.)

*Small sample size, but the Twins can hit but can't pitch? Is that right? As expected.

*Corey Brewer scored 51 points in a game? Also, the Wolves have defeated the Grizzlies, Heat, Spurs and Rockets while we were away, but they also lost to the Magic and Kings? Yeah, that sounds just about right for a season that makes no sense.

*Justin Holl. Seriously, one of the most amazing finishes to a game we have ever seen. No other way to describe a short-handed tie-breaking goal with 0.6 seconds left in an NCAA semifinal against a bitter rival.

*And the Wild will face ... Colorado in the playoffs? We can only hope coach Patrick Roy comes out of retirement to let in another Game 7 overtime goal.

OK, there was tons more that happened. But we need to save some of it for some longer posts on what figure to be plenty of long nights.

TFD: Derek Jeter is the 11th-greatest leader in the WORLD, says magazine

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: March 26, 2014 - 5:12 PM

Yeah, Derek Jeter is retiring so we need to say more nice things about him than usual. But is he really the 11th-best leader in the world?

That's what Fortune magazine will have you believe:

As he begins his 20th and final season in pinstripes, Jeter remains the type of role-model player that even a Red Sox fan must grudgingly respect. It's not the five World Series rings he's won or his team record for career hits. In a steroid-tainted, reality-TV era, Jeter, the son of two Army veterans, continues to stand out because of his old-school approach: Never offer excuses or give less than maximum effort.

Never gives less than maximum effort except with gift baskets. Probably why he isn't number one.

Quite a specific dress code for new entertainment district near St. Louis ballpark

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: March 26, 2014 - 3:28 PM

St. Louis has a new entertainment district that's right next to Busch Stadium.

That's good!

A lot of the bars there are clear on what you can wear and what you can't wear.

That's ... well, what is that?

Per Deadspin:

Eight of the bars located in the village share the following post-9:00 p.m. dress code:

The following is not permitted under our dress code after 9pm: sleeveless shirts on men, profanity on clothing, exposed undergarments on men, sweat pants, full sweat suits, excessively long shirts (when standing upright with arms at your side, the bottom of your shirt can not extend below the tip of your fingers), jerseys (sleeved jerseys are permitted in conjunction with a cardinals game or any other major St. Louis sporting event), athletic shorts and excessively sagging pants or shorts, bandanas.

Hmm. That's ... well ... that's ... um ... very specific.

Mid-day fun: Pavement's 'Cut Your Hair' re-imagined as a song about the Twins' lineup

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: March 24, 2014 - 12:04 PM

This started as a weird little back-and-forth on Twitter between us and RandBallsStu. It ended as a full-blown parody. We stole a couple lines from Stu's tweets, but otherwise the inspiration is all ours (and the Twins). Here is Pavement's "Cut Your Hair" re-imagined as a song about the Twins' offense. This is from the CD "Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain," which is much better thought of as "Crooked Numbers, Crooked Numbers?" Also, the original song and video are at the top for inspiration. Here we go:

Darlin’ go ahead and cut your roster

Do you think it’s gonna make things change?

You’re just a team with the same lineup,

And that’s a pretty bad lineup.

Scoring is a puzzle, offense getting muzzled, batter missed a sign

Look on deck, pinch hit, it’s 3-1 in the sixth

The bullpen phone is found.



Baseball scene's crazy, guys sent down each and every day

I saw another one just the other day 

A special new call-up

I remember scoring

I don't remember why

I don't remember where 

But I don't care, I care, I really don't care 

Did you see the second baseman’s hair? 



High OBPs and some pop a must.

No retreads!   

Runs mean a lot 

When runs are bought 

Or so, I’ve heard 

Rob, run down to the office phone 

Deal some pitching for some bats. 

Correia, Correia, Correia, Correia, Correia, Correia!

Weekend Lowdown: For when you get sick of basketball

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: March 22, 2014 - 12:30 PM

More than a few Americans joined me in taking Thursday and Friday of last week off, mostly to lounge in front of the TV, watching college hoops. If you're like us, you're going to be doing the same thing today and tomorrow; I don't need to tell you how to find those games, since you already have the channels memorized.

If you finally get tired of hoops, though, here's what else to check out this weekend:

Noon: Twins vs. Yankees (FSN Plus and MLB Network). Kevin Correia starts for the Twins, Masahiro Tanaka for the Yankees. I feel strongly that Tanaka needs to start going by one single name, like Ronaldo used to in soccer. Kevin Correia could also do this, too, but should you start suggesting names in the comments, I guarantee that those comments will get deleted.

1pm: Detroit at Wild (FSN). I have always enjoyed a matinee hockey game; there's something truly delightful about getting your hockey fix and then walking outside and finding out that you still have eight or nine hours left over for activities.

9pm: Dodgers vs. Diamondbacks, in Australia (MLB Network). It's regular-season baseball, which we enjoy, as long as we ignore this game being played on the other side of the world and more than a week before the rest of the regular-season games begin.

6:30pm Sunday: Wild at Detroit (NBCSN). It's pretty rare that you see two NHL teams playing a home-and-home weekend series, but that's exactly what's happening for Minnesota and the Red Wings this weekend. No doubt NBC Sports is hoping for a couple of brawls this afternoon that carry over into some bad blood for Sunday night's game.

What to read this weekend

Joe Posnanski explored the legend of Louis Sockalexis, and the origin of the name "Cleveland Indians," and whether the team was named to honor one of the great lost ballplayers, or just an early-20th-century racist caricature.

Also, Joe Prince-Wright of NBC Sports looked at Minnesota United's preseason trip to the UK, and why our local soccer team traveled across the pond just for practice.

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