Michael Rand started RandBall with hopes that he could convince the world to love jumpsuits as much as he does. So far, he's only succeeded in using the word "redacted" a lot. He welcomes suggestions, news tips, links of pure genius, and pictures of pets in Halloween costumes here, though he already knows he will regret that last part.

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Posts about Dogs

TFD: Very controversial dog breed rankings

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: February 11, 2014 - 5:45 PM

Spencer Hall, who usually writes about college football, drinking or both, has ranked dog breeds from 1-171 on the heels of this year's Westminster Kennel Club show.

We're OK with his rankings, mostly because he has the pug at No. 19 -- tough but fair, pugs aren't for everyone, even if they are No. 1 on our big board.

Rottweilers are second to last, while cocker spaniels are the Mr. Irrelevant of his dog draft.

Feel free to check out his entire list, and his reasoning.

Awwww: Stray dog follows cyclists in China for more than 1,000 miles

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: May 30, 2012 - 12:56 PM

OK, so you need to read this:

The incredible journey of Xiao Sa began on the streets of Yajiang, Sichuan province. Zhang Heng, a 22-year-old student from Hubei, was on a graduation cycling trip to Lhasa, when he saw the small dog lying tired on the street. He and his friends stopped to feed her, and the pooch started following them. At first, they thought she was just doing it for fun and would give up when she got tired, but the dog stuck with them day and night, and the guys felt she really wanted to go with them, so they decided to take her along to the end.

It turns out the cyclists were right, Xiao Sa really wanted to accompany them on their trip, and she showed incredible determination over the 20 days she ran alongside her new-found friends, all the way to Lhasa, Tibet. She traveled a total of 1,138 miles, climbed ten mountains over 4,000 meters high, and ran on uphill sections where many bikers prefer to take the bus. The only portion of the journey where Xiao Sa didn’t have to run was on a steep slope in Litang, where downhill speeds reach 70 km per hour, which made it impossible to catch up. So the cyclists made a cage for her and gave Sa a ride to the bottom, where she resumed her journey on foot.

Guest post: Local Quipster and the wiener races

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated: July 7, 2010 - 2:57 PM

We've always meant to attend the wiener dog races out at Canterbury. But we never have. Now, though, we have the next best thing: a true-to-life account of the races from Local Quipster, who was nice enough to compile a guest post that almost kind of makes sense. This is the way we imagine Hunter S. Thompson might have covered the event. LQ?


There are few events that capture the essence of Americana on Independence Day weekend: Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest, Major League Baseball, a 4-year-old igniting legitimate fireworks when his mother leaves the party, and the Canterbury Dachshund Dash.

The event on Sunday featured defending champion Ozzie with his steely blue eyes and yippy demeanor. It was a turbulent offseason for Ozzie — first the PED rumors, then the lice, and of course, the incident in the bathroom of Uncle Franky’s in which his bodyguard ended up with a cone.

Taking some heat off Ozzie, in the weeks leading up to the competition there were several competitors who made headlines in the Dachshund Racing community. The #6 dog – a wirehair wiener named Philly — found himself in hot water with the International Dachshund Racing Committee upon rumors that he was in fact 51% Jamaican sheep dog, a fact that would disqualify him from the annual Dash.

The situation escalated at the pre-race press conference when Philly came in wearing a Rastafarian red, yellow, and green hat and simply said “Woof!” before walking off the stage. “At this point, we don’t have the ability to prove anything so he will be allowed to race,” said IRDC chairman Tim Schmidt. “But it’s pretty clear that he is mocking the process and that it’s ridiculous that we put microphones in front of dogs."

At race time Philly went off at 7-2 odds as much of the late betting went to he and Ozzie.

As the wieners came out of the gate, it was clear that the bettors who took a chance of Roli would be rolling in dough. Roli won in a convincing victory, with some other dog getting Place and Philly getting the Show.

After the race, Roli thanked his foster family as he never knew his parents.


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