Michael Rand started RandBall with hopes that he could convince the world to love jumpsuits as much as he does. So far, he's only succeeded in using the word "redacted" a lot. He welcomes suggestions, news tips, links of pure genius, and pictures of pets in Halloween costumes here, though he already knows he will regret that last part.
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Name: Rondell White
Claim to Fame, Minnesota: a member of your 2006 and 2007 Minnesota Twins. Like your Craig Monroes and Phil Nevins, White was the budget veteran acquisition who the Twins really hoped would add some pop to the lineup. He did not. In his two years with the hometown nine, he tallied a mere 11 jack jobs. If the Mitchell Report is to be believed, that averages out to $318/dinger for the check he wrote for steroids and HGH in 2005, three months before landing in Minnesota.
Has the Real Rondell White Finally Arrived: no, Minnesota Public Radio, he has not.
Claim to Fame, Everywhere Else: spent the non-journeyman portion of his career with the Montreal Expos (RIP) organization, where he toiled 10 years before being dealt to the Chicago Cubs in 2000. After that, he went everywhere, man: stints with the Yankees, Padres, Royals and Tigers followed, before his final stop here.
Where He Is Now: per Wiki, he lives in Gray, Georgia, near his birthplace of Milledgeville.
Why Have I Heard of Milledgeville Before: because Ben Roethlisberger was there once.
Is He on Twitter: no.
Has He Ever Been in a Twitter Feud with Patrick Reusse: no.
Glorious Randomness: he is Jerry Manuel’s son-in-law.
If you haven't seen this already, here is Ken Griffey Jr. giving exactly zero [redacteds] about his live appearance on SportsCenter on behalf of Upper Deck.
It isn't possible to care less. It simply isn't.
"I'm not going to lie. We need an extra bat, especially a right-handed bat," Cano told CBSSports.com. "We have many left-handed hitters. We need at least one more righty. You don't want to face a lefty pitcher with a lineup of seven left-handed hitters."
GM Jack Zduriencik doesn't necessarily disagree. How can he? Not after the Mariners posted an MLB-low .657 OPS vs. left-handers last year, then added two more lefty hitters in Cano and Logan Morrison as two of its three main offensive pieces while losing the righty-swinging Michael Morse and switch-hitting Kendrys Morales.
"We are a little lefthanded, and we know it," Zduriencik said.
Cano -- whose $240 million, 10-year deal with Seattle is tied for the third richest in MLB history -- offers a solution, and it's the obvious one; bring back Morales, who remains a free agent working out for weeks at the Scott Boras Training Institute in Miami Gardens, Fla.
"He's a switch hitter who's got power," Cano noted. Not only that, but Morales possesses power proven to work at Safeco Field, as he posted 23 homers and 80 RBI in his inaugural season in Seattle.
So just go buy more players, Seattle. It's just that easy.
This year? The numbers were just released, and the Twins are at 70.5. Yes, that translates into 91.5 losses -- another 90-loss season -- but it's three games more optimistic than a year ago.
We'll do Bovada a few better. We would take the over. We think the Twins cruise past 70 and get up to around 74-77 wins this year -- not perfect, but closer to .500 at least and not another 90-loss year.
Your thoughts on the line, our prediction or Glen Perkins' facial hair maturity in the comments, please.
The Hunt Down
Name: Craig Monroe
Claim to Fame, Minnesota: a member of your 2008 Minnesota Twins. Like your Rondell Whites and Phil Nevins before him, Monroe was the budget veteran acquisition who the Twins really hoped would add some pop to the lineup. He did not. After being acquired from the Cubs in November 2007 for a player to be named later, Monroe belted a mere 8 jack jobs before the Twins released him in August. Chicago eventually received Doug Deeds, Aaron Gleeman’s 35th-best Twins prospect of 2007.
Did the Twins Give Up On Craig Monroe Too Soon: no, Bleacher Report, they did not.
Claim to Fame, Everywhere Else: best known for his stint with the Detroit Tigers from 2002-2007, where he earned a reputation as a Twins killer. Monroe began his career with the Texas Rangers, and closed it in 2009 with the Pirates.
Has He Been Arrested for Alleged Belt Theft: yes.
Has He Ever Been in a Twitter Feud with Patrick Reusse: no.
Glorious Randomness: his middle name is “Keystone,” which brings us to our Power Rankings of budget-conscious beers that can also conceivably be used as your child’s middle name, Michael.
4.Natty/Natural (Not Natty Ice, that’s just stupid)
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