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Clearance Clarence: Once Tebowing dies down, why not try Mauering?

Posted by: Michael Rand under Twins fans Updated: November 1, 2011 - 12:07 PM

 

Commenter Clarence Swamptown writes every week about issues that are dear to his corrupt mind. This works out very well for him and readers. As usual, the opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of RandBall or the Star Tribune. Clarence?

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As discussed on RandBall last week, a phenomenon called “Tebowing” is currently sweeping the nation. The Tebowing concept is simple: Take a picture of someone kneeling like Tim Tebow and post it on the internet.
 
If Owling and Planking are any indication, this Tebowing fad will fade quickly and it will be immediately replaced by some other obsession. I’ve always wanted to start a stupid worldwide phenomenon (my “topless Tuesdays” idea never really caught on) so I hereby propose “Mauering” as a candidate for the next internet craze.
 
The brilliance of Mauering is in its simplicity. You’re probably doing it right now. Just sit down. That’s it. Maybe you’re not feeling very good, or maybe you feel fine. It doesn’t really matter, just sit down. Also, try to look stoic and maybe even a little disinterested. See, you’re Mauering like a pro! It’s that easy. And the Mauering sensation is already catching on with a number of influential groups and celebrities. For example:
 
 
Mauer Mauering.
 
 
Tebow Mauering.
 
 
Occupy Wall Street protesters Mauering in defiance of corporate greed.
 
 
Sven Sundgaard Mauering incorrectly. That’s way too much smiling Sven. We’re looking for more apathy and resignation.
 
 
His Holiness the Dalai Lama Mauering perfectly.
 
 
Paul Bunyan Mauering.
 
 
 
Jay Cutler, early Mauering innovator.
 
See, Mauering is catching on like wildfire! If you want to do some Mauering on the Twitter, I politely request that you use the #mauering hashtag. Or you can try Mauering on your respective Facebooks and MySpaces and whatever. It’s the internet sensation that’s sweeping the nation*. Everyone** is doing it. Have at it knuckleheads.
 
*Twins’ clubhouse.
**Twins’ roster.

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