Left the country for two weeks, returned to find that our sports teams are more predictable than the effect of Mexican tap water on the dainty American gastrointestinal system.
Stop me if I’ve heard this one:
• Joe Mauer is hurt.
• The Twins can’t hit.
• The Wild signed a player with local ties.
• A former Twin found success after leaving — this time Vance Worley in Pittsburgh.
• The Timberwolves conducted a draft that caused their fan base to collectively smack their foreheads so hard that they will be able to file a concussion lawsuit.
• Kevin Love is dying to leave.
So I didn’t miss anything.
The Twins will bottom-feed until their best prospects establish themselves as winning big-league players.
The Vikings will invest faith in another defensive coordinator they believe can get the most out of their players.
Our two primary winter-sports franchises have become even more predictable.
The Wild is selling out to win a championship.
The Timberwolves are in full retreat from their remarkably modest goal of someday returning to the playoffs.
As the Wild’s brain trust has maneuvered to gain credibility over the past four years, it has made plenty of moves deserving criticism, or at least prompting skepticism.
The Timberwolves, despite deserved cynicism, have made a handful of moves that seemed promising, including hiring Rick Adelman to coach.
But the Wild’s boldness has elevated the franchise to the point where its talk about someday winning a Stanley Cup now sounds more like a plan than a hope, while the Timberwolves have put Flip Saunders’ old band back together as they prepare to trade their only star.
Clearly, the Wild has operated with more intelligence than the Timberwolves, but there also is a difference between the franchises that leaves the Wolves lacking:
|Chicago WSox||0||Top 1st Inning|
|Tampa Bay||0||Top 2nd Inning|
|Detroit||0||Bottom 1st Inning|
|Seattle - C. Young||12:35 PM|
|Boston - B. Workman|
|Baltimore - B. Norris||1:20 PM|
|Chicago Cubs - K. Hendricks|
|San Francisco - T. Lincecum||3:05 PM|
|Washington - J. Zimmermann|
|Houston - C. McHugh||6:05 PM|
|Cleveland - D. Salazar|
|St. Louis - S. Miller||6:05 PM|
|Philadelphia - D. Buchanan|
|Atlanta - E. Santana||6:10 PM|
|Cincinnati - M. Leake|
|Pittsburgh - E. Volquez||6:10 PM|
|Milwaukee - W. Peralta|
|San Diego - A. Cashner||7:10 PM|
|Arizona - V. Nuno|
|Miami - T. Koehler||7:10 PM|
|Colorado - J. Lyles|
|Detroit - J. Verlander||7:10 PM|
|Minnesota - T. May|
|Kansas City - J. Guthrie||7:25 PM|
|Texas - N. Tepesch|
|LA Angels - C. Wilson||8:05 PM|
|Oakland - J. Lester|
|NY Mets - J. deGrom||8:10 PM|
|Los Angeles - Z. Greinke|
|Tampa Bay||3:30 PM|
|New Orleans||7:00 PM|
|St. Louis||7:00 PM|
|San Diego||8/24/14 3:00 PM|
|Cincinnati||8/24/14 7:00 PM|
|Atlanta||8/28/14 5:00 PM|
|Detroit||8/28/14 6:00 PM|
|Indianapolis||8/28/14 6:00 PM|
|Kansas City||8/28/14 6:00 PM|
|NY Jets||8/28/14 6:00 PM|
|St. Louis||8/28/14 6:00 PM|
|Carolina||8/28/14 6:30 PM|
|New England||8/28/14 6:30 PM|
|Washington||8/28/14 6:30 PM|
|Baltimore||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|Chicago||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|Denver||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|Minnesota||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|San Francisco||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|Arizona||8/28/14 9:00 PM|
|Seattle||8/28/14 9:00 PM|
|(21) Texas A&M||8/28/14 5:00 PM|
|(9) So Carolina|
|Wake Forest||8/28/14 6:00 PM|
|Boise State||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|(18) Ole Miss|
|Tulane||8/28/14 7:00 PM|
|Temple||8/28/14 8:15 PM|
|Rutgers||8/28/14 9:00 PM|
|Weber State||8/28/14 9:30 PM|
|(19) Arizona State|
|BYU||8/29/14 6:00 PM|
|(6) Jacksonville St||8/29/14 6:30 PM|
|(8) Michigan State|
|Bowling Green||8/29/14 6:30 PM|
|TX-San Antonio||8/29/14 8:00 PM|
|Colorado State||8/29/14 8:00 PM|
|UNLV||8/29/14 9:30 PM|
|UCF||8/30/14 7:30 AM|
|Red Bull New York|
|Chivas USA||6:30 PM|
|Sporting Kansas City|
|Vancouver FC||9:30 PM|
|Calgary||8/24/14 2:00 PM|
|Saskatchewan||8/24/14 6:00 PM|
|Ottawa||8/29/14 6:30 PM|
|Winnipeg||8/31/14 2:00 PM|
|Toronto||9/1/14 12:00 PM|
|Edmonton||9/1/14 3:30 PM|