Count Chocula beer will return. Why? Because some people will buy it, realizing it completes their journey into eternal adolescence. Eternal early adolescence. Next:

If you can walk up to a bar and say “I’ll have a Fruity Yummy Mummy” without fearing that the ghost of Humphrey Bogart will suddenly appear and punch you in the mouth, then that’s the beer for you.

DESIGN Where you are born influences how much you’ll make when you grow up, says the NYT. Here’s the interesting part: the copy resets when you choose other locations. It’s almost spooky. The story rewrites itself right before your eyes. The Ministry of Truth is probably writing out a check for the technology as we speak.

SCIENCE! It’s called Stygiomedusa Gigantea, which gives you a sense of its proportions. Digg says it’s proof that the ocean is full of terrifying monsters. True. But the Enoeque ambient music helps.

It would be different if you played some Schoenberg.

UFOs To be accurate, it would be a Unidentified Flying Humanoid. Mysterious Universe says:

The flying humanoid was spotted over Sequoia Park east of Los Angeles. According to the note uploaded with the video, it was seen by dozens of witnesses and recorded by three different video devices. The humanoid appears to be in a space suit and there are slits in the visor that some witnesses claimed allowed them to see a face inside.

Three cameras? Finally. Here it is:

You may wonder what this all means.

Put a floating humanoid over California and talk naturally turns to Project Blue Beam, the infamous conspiracy theory that NASA is creating a New Age religion headed by the Antichrist to start a New World Order.

Naturally.

HISTORY “11 Striking Images from England” sounds like bad clickbait from one of those desperate sites that chum the bottom of web pages, but it’s actually underselling the piece. They’re excerpts from an upcoming book from the Historic England Archive, and they’re fascinating. #7 is Shocking!

Sorry.