Oct. 20, 2008: Too quick to trust those who pretend to care

Hunter Sargent doesn't know Justin Hamilton, but hearing the news of his brutal beating and torture stung as if he received the blows himself.

Most of Hamilton's broken bones and burns will eventually heal. But what scares Sargent, who is 32 and, like Hamilton, an adult living with fetal alcohol syndrome, is that the betrayal -- by someone Hamilton considered a "sister," according to court documents -- will leave psychological scars deeper than any physical wound.

Sargent can relate. He grew up in an environment that subjected him to physical and sexual abuse. It shaped who he is today.

"I don't like people to pretend they care about me, and if they don't, they need to let me know, because otherwise they will go toward that vulnerable spot in me," said Sargent, who lives in New Hope and often speaks to groups of the day-to-day challenges he faces. "And if you stomp on me, that hurts 10 times worse than not getting any attention at all."

Four men -- John Maniglia, Glen Ries, John Diepold and Timothy Ketterling -- are charged with multiple felonies, accused of taking Hamilton to a remote Dakota County location and beating and torturing him on two separate occasions. A teenager, 16-year-old Natasha Dahn of Lakeville, is in a juvenile detention facility and may be charged as an adult for her role in the crime. Dahn, who had recently befriended Hamilton, allegedly lied to the men that he had hit her, which instigated the attack, prosecutors say.

Though Hamilton clearly realized the gravity of what happened to him, what may remain fuzzy to him is just how it occurred. What is known is that Hamilton considered Dahn his "best friend," and "sister," according to his website, though his family said the two had known each other only a few weeks.

A penchant for quick attachment is common for adults with the disorder, said Jodee Kulp, a parent advocate. Kulp relates a story of one man affected by it who was trying on clothing at a department store. The salesperson's praise of how good the young man looked led him to believe that she liked him and wanted to be his friend. When people tried to explain that the woman was only doing her job, he failed to understand and was crushed.

However, such devotion can be preyed upon, resulting in affected young people being recruited by gangs and other groups as fetchers and pawns.

"Why? Because they're 'stupid.' Because they're 'funny,'" Kulp said facetiously. "They're vulnerable, and can have no abstract reasoning."

Prone to risky behavior

According to the Minnesota Organization on Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (MOFAS) website, fetal alcohol spectrum disorders -- the umbrella term that covers fetal alcohol syndrome and other diagnoses related to maternal alcohol use -- occur in 10 per 1,000 live births, and fetal alcohol syndrome occurs in 0.5 to 2 per 1,000 live births. Because it's organic brain damage, the effects don't fade into adulthood, said Sue Terwey, program director with MOFAS.

"Often their own judgment isn't so good, so they get themselves into high-risk situations," Terwey said. "They may need a lot more structure and supervision to do right."

Naivete and "concrete thinking" that often affect the judgment of adults by the disorder, topped with the tendency to become quickly attached and trust people, is what makes them most vulnerable to being taken advantage of, experts on the condition say. And though Justin Hamilton's consequences were extreme, the circumstances are not. To those who know best what it's like to live with the disorder, it brings to light the importance of protecting adults with disabilities.

Like Sargent, Monica Marie Adams, 38, of Minnetrista is articulate. Her mind travels a mile a minute, as evidenced by the flurry of ideas that run from it without transition. While exceedingly bright, she constantly has to remain on guard to protect herself from others who, even meaning well, could present harm, she said.

The fact that most adults with the disorder don't have easily discernible facial features that clue others in to the condition makes it all the more dangerous.

"Let's take matters of, shall we say, fear," she said. "You never foresee something coming. Whether it's a personal relationship that's going to go bad, you don't see the signs coming. Take, for instance, in this case, how you can get someone to beat on you one day, and the next day, have them come and pick you up again."

As friends, family and even strangers rally around Hamilton, Sargent, who can relate to trauma, said that although recovery may be slow, an understanding support system will be not only helpful, but crucial.

"It's going to take people, especially when you've been harmed like he was. I don't see Justin recovering psychologically really quick, and if he does, that's amazing," Sargent said. "If I were in his shoes, I don't know if I'd trust anyone for a real long time. And that's the sad part."

Abby Simons • 612-673-4921