There's a good reason the class Maureen Campion teaches at the Parenting Oasis in Minneapolis is called "The Money Fight" and not "The Money Celebration."

Few families are celebrating in this economy, and while finances are not an uncommon source of tension between couples, additional pressures -- such as coping with job loss and a reduction of income -- can make a tough topic even harder to negotiate.

Campion, a licensed psychologist with Minnesota Valley Psychologists in Burnsville, said most financial battles aren't just about dollars and cents; they're rooted in connection and security.

"Money means different things to different people. For some, it's security, and for others, it is freedom," she said. "The challenge for couples comes in making sure everyone's needs are being met as they determine the best way to run the 'family business,' which is really what managing family finances is all about."

Clemma Muller and her husband, Sacha, of south Minneapolis have taken another class Campion offers called "Parenting in Partnership," which includes tips about money management. For the Mullers, parents of two boys ages 4 and 2, the subject of bill paying was once a sore point.

"My husband would stay up late at night to do the bills, long after I went to bed, and I found that it was very stressful for me not to know when and how things were being paid," Muller said. "We talked it through and came up with a system where he e-mails me all the expenses and I log them onto a spreadsheet on my computer."

The couple also follows another of Campion's suggestions: They schedule a monthly meeting to discuss their finances and occasionally even hire a baby sitter so they can go out and have a glass of wine together. "Talking about our family budget on a regular basis has helped us prioritize the things that are important to us," Muller said.

If times are particularly tough, Campion advises parents to have age-appropriate conversations with children regarding the family's financial situation.

"They need to know you are going to provide for them in the best way you can. They can certainly be told -- in kid-friendly terms -- if there is no money in the budget for a vacation, summer camp or some of their usual extracurricular activities," she said.

Parents can be their own worst enemies when it comes to spending money. "We have a generation of parents now who feel guilty if their kids have to do without," Campion said. "They can also keep their money struggles pretty invisible until their kids start having to pass on doing things."

Campion, whose children are 25, 8 and 6, said she frequently talks to her younger ones about how work "works" and explains that the time she spends in her job goes toward providing for the common good of the family.

She believes talking honestly to kids about money can be a teachable moment. "There are choices we all make about money that reflect our value system," Campion said.

"Include kids in discussions about what you're working toward as a family and what you can all do to realize those goals. If there are problems, be very clear, but don't offer much detail. Let them know you have a plan."

Julie Pfitzinger is a West St. Paul freelance writer. Got an idea for the Your Family page? E-mail us at tellus@startribune.com with "Your Family" in the subject line.