C.J.: White teeth, plus rib-tickling fun at Market Bar-B-Que

Comedian Dane Cook left Market Bar-B-Que with ribs in his teeth and a tip on how to whiten those choppers.

Cook had performed Saturday at Target Center. He and his contingent arrived at the Nicollet Avenue barbecue spot about 1:30 a.m. Sunday, after a 45-minute walk from a destination they did not disclose to server Betty Schuler. "They were winded when they got here and sat down and said, Where's your water? I joked with them; they were really fun people. They liked the music [playing]. They tried to get me to sing along because they heard me singing in the kitchen," she told me Friday. Marvin Gaye was singing "Sexual Healing," about which Schuler told them, "This is baby-making music." When Cook cracked up, Schuler said it was nice to make a comedian laugh.

The Cook party took pictures with various Market staffers.

After Cook's photo with Schuler, she told him, "I have whiter teeth than you," and the comedian asked what the server used to accomplish that. "I use Target white strips, the generic kind," Shuler told me.

Schuler's boss, Market owner Steve Polski, said that the party had the potato skins, chicken and ribs and diet Coke and that Cook was "a very generous tipper." Why wouldn't he be, after enjoying the favorite Minneapolis ribs of another comedian, Jay Leno, and learning how to get those pearly whites even whiter?

Market Bar-B-Que's prez-in-waiting, Anthony Polski, became irate with a difficult caller to the restaurant, who began the call with: May I speak to Steve Polski?

"May I ask who's calling?" Anthony asked.

"No, you may not," the caller said politely.

"I'm his son! I need to know who's calling!" Anthony insisted.

"No, you don't," the caller said, vexing Anthony further. They went a few more rounds before little Mr. Polski screamed, "C.J.! It's you!!!"

Nosey Anthony's ears always perk up when a woman calls for his dad. Anthony's such an easy mark that his dad once sent a pregnant diner over to tell Anthony that a new half-sibling was on the way. Anthony fell for the joke.

"Instead of poking around in my personal life, Anthony should have been out promoting our sauces, which are now available at Lunds, Byerly's and Fleet Farm," Steve said.

Fleet Farm? "I know Stewart Mills, who owns Fleet Farm, and his son Jason, who have been fans of the Market and have been kind enough to put our sauce in his [more than 30] stores in the Midwest."

"In My Dreams," I could not have fantasized what an interesting afternoon Friday would be as I made calls to confirm that REO Speedwagon's Neal Doughty married an Austin teacher, Darya Trimble, last weekend in Minneapolis.

An e-mailer tipped me off about the ceremony, which was followed by dinner at Basil's. A couple of contacts at Basil's eventually resulted in confirmation that a VIP who booked space there was Doughty. "They make a lovely family," wrote an e-mailer, who asked to remain anonymous.

So I began calling people in Austin with the name Trimble and fell into a story with all the moods of REO's greatest hits: "Roll With The Changes," "That Ain't Love," "Keep On Loving You." When the interviews were finished, I was feeling very "Time For Me To Fly."

I stupidly asked Darya's ex-husband, Scott Trimble, whether there was any way he could call Darya and ask her to telephone me. "Um, I don't want to talk to her; you can talk to her," Scott Trimble said, calmly giving me her number. When I asked him a question about his ex-wife's relationship with the rocker, Scott Trimble again calmly said: "I'm not going to get into that with you. You can talk to her." As I thanked him for his help, Scott said, "Wow," while hanging up the phone.

I left Darya a message telling her we REALLY must speak. When Darya called back, one concern was paramount: What had Scott said? Identifying herself as "Darya Gemmel," she told me that she goes by her maiden name: "No, I don't want you to make this about my relationship with my ex-husband. Neal and I are happy. Our kids are happy. ... No more comment. No more comment. Would you like a story or do you want smut?" As she whispered in the background, I said that I just wanted to know what happened. Darya laughed, said, "Wow" and hung up.

Darya was more fiery than Scott or his mother, Marlys Trimble, with whom I also spoke.

Marlys matter-a-factly told me that her kids had been big REO fans in the '70s and that Scott's "got one of his albums, I guess, if he hasn't smashed it." The breakup "was a shock here. This town isn't that large, you know."

Marlys was quite generous in tone while describing Darya as "a very good teacher."

C.J. is at 612.332.TIPS or cj@startribune.com. More of her attitude can be seen on Fox 9 Thursday mornings.