This blog covers everything except sports and gardening, unless we find a really good link about using dead professional bowlers for mulch. The author is a StarTribune columnist, has been passing off fiction and hyperbole as insight since 1997, has run his own website since the Jurassic era of AOL, and was online when today’s college sophomores were a year away from being born. So get off his lawn.
Happy Friday to all. Have you earned it? Did you feel like this long slog through the slough of travail will be justly rewarded when the whistle blows and you slide down the dino’s tale, or has this been a smooth skate? Either way, you’ll take it. Friday is my favorite day of the week, because nothing is due tomorrow. Period. This is why I did not become an OB-GYN.
POLICE BLOTTER This seems unwise:
Drunken driving. Two drunken men were riding a scooter in the Life Time Fitness parking lot, 2100 Northdale Blvd. NW., and trying to start fights with people. Officers arrested a 21-year-old man for drunken driving and an 18-year-old man for underage consumption.
Yes, that’s the best place to pick fights: outside a gym. More here, including my favorite recurring crime: meat theft. Always someone trying to boost meat from Cub.
INTERNETS Ran across this site about Vintage Disney, which I enjoyed because I like vintage, and Disney. But of course anyone could do a vintage Disney site. This one is devoted to vintage Disney tickets. Narrowcasting: the web’s secret weapon.
Then again, big deal! I have vintage Disney tickets. Here:
That’s right. Uh huh. I got swag. First day tickets from the opening of Disneyworld. Serial number is F000001: the very first series of tickets. I’ll bet they’re worth something. Or would be, if they weren’t a replica that came with a book of reproduced Disney ephemera.
Worth1000.comhas an ongoing contest on vintage ads. Some of the ads just swap out the original sponsor for Viagra or some other drug, ha ha. It’s remarkable how the patrons of the site, masters of Photoshop, can’t get the “retro” feel. It’s as if they’ve only seen parodies. They confuse the styles of various eras, mashes them up into old-timey vivisections, where 20s types are grafted onto 50s images, and so on.
Here’s one that gets it right, more or less:
Double apostrophe fail and a lousy font use. Lots more, here.
WISDOM: I am not making up the fact that Dave Barry gave an interview about his lifetime achievement award. You know, it’s probably been ten years since he used that line. Mention it to his face and he’ll smile politely. He’s a very polite guy, even when talking about what really hurt the newspaper industry. (English majors.) (AHEM.)
“Man plunges off cliff while texting” about how he shouldn’t text while driving, or he might have an accident. Well, yes. Six months later he’s here to tell us not to text.
If you get the Priceline ad, no, I don’t know what’s going on there. Like most “funny” ads it features people who are hideous exaggerations of actual personality types, amplified for comic effect.
Off to write the Sunday column. No idea what it'll be. But it'll be something. Have a great weekend; see you around.