Dear Gov. Andrew Cuomo:
I am writing to express my deep disappointment with your recent remarks about “extreme conservative” political candidates in your state of New York.“Is the Republican Party in this state a moderate party or is it an extreme conservative party? ... Are (the members) extreme conservative, right-to-life, pro-assault weapon, anti-gay?” you asked. “Is that who they are?
“Because if that’s who they are, and if they are the extreme conservatives, they have no place in the state of New York,” you said. “Because that’s not who New Yorkers are.”
This was a terrible thing to say. It would be like the governor of Mississippi, the state with the worst oral hygiene, saying, “We don’t need anybody here who has all their teeth.”What few conservative Republicans there are in New York have a right to be upset at your remarks, Gov. Cuomo.
But probably not as upset as me.Because if you’re successful at wishing away a group of New Yorkers you don’t like, where do think your outcasts are going to move?
That’s right, Florida.
Every New Yorker eventually moves to Florida anyway. But now you’re trying to expedite the process for just the sort of people we’ve already got here in sufficient numbers.
In fact, we may have already exceeded our quotas on gun nuts and gay-bashers.
Even worse, your words may have triggered a premature evacuation of Nassau County resident and professional gasbag Sean Hannity.
I had fully expected the Fox News oracle to become a cantankerous Florida resident 20 years from now.
I could already envision an elderly Hannity waving his pen in the air as he constantly interrupts the speakers at the homeowner association meetings in some guard-gate community in Palm Beach Gardens or Jupiter.
But now your intemperate remarks have potentially accelerated Hannity’s inevitable exodus to Florida — which might be good for you but terrible for us here in Florida.
Hannity launched into a hissy fit, threatening to leave the “United Socialist State of New York” in three years because of what you said.
“I want you to know that I can’t wait to get out of here,” Hannity told his radio audience. “I really can’t. I don’t want to pay their 10 percent state tax anymore ... I can’t wait to pay no state income tax down in Florida or Texas. I haven’t decided yet, but I’m leaning Florida because I like the water and I like to fish.”
Then to make matters worse, our Gov. Rick Scott personally invited Hannity to Florida.
“You get to keep your money,” Scott told Hannity. “You get a big pay raise by coming down here. The weather’s better. We love people.”
I love people, too. But we’ve already got a full-time Rush Limbaugh and a part-time Donald Trump. That’s more than enough love for one community to bear.
So you need to get on the phone, Gov. Cuomo, and make this right. Apologize and beg Hannity to stay in New York until it’s the normal time for him to move to Florida.
Just remind him that he lives in New York because it’s the capital of the media world, the place where his employer Fox News expects him to show up for a job that pays him a reported $20 million a year.
Remind Hannity that he’s not going to make that kind of money in Florida doing the morning news with John Favole on WPTV-Channel 5.
Remind him of this, too: When Scott told Hannity: “You can get a job. I have 285,000 job openings in the state right now,” Scott was not talking about $20 million-a-year gasbag gigs.
He was talking about manning a Slurpee machine in Titusville.
Please, Gov. Cuomo, remind Hannity that his time to come to Florida will arrive in due time. But he’s only 52 years old.
That’s young by Florida standards.
And being young and cranky makes him only half-ready for the move.