The most shocking moment of "The Comedy Central Roast of Roseanne" (9 p.m., Comedy Central) isn't Jeff Ross dressing up as Joe Paterno. It's the surprise appearance of ex-husband Tom Arnold, who gets a shout-out from the honoree herself at the end. "I hope your current wife isn't in it for your money," she quipped. "I mean, my money."Monday
Brenda Johnson goes out with a bang in the series finale of "The Closer" (8 p.m., TNT). But fans won't have much time to grieve. The premiere of its spinoff, "Major Crimes" (9 p.m., TNT), follows with Mary McDonnell's character rebooting the series in such copycat fashion that it's almost like watching a rerun. The only thing missing: Kyra Sedgwick's drawl.Tuesday
"Collection Intervention" (9 p.m., Syfy) sounds like a pop-culture version of "Hoarders" with auctioneer experts trying to secure "Star Wars" and Barbie memorabilia from those whose don't know when to quit. Among the finds: a dining room stuffed with 30,000 comic books and a garage filled with Catwoman gear. Holy leather suits, Batman!Wednesday
"Oh, Sit!" (7 p.m., WUCW, Ch. 23) elevates musical chairs into a fast-paced game show with contestants vying for big money. If this show beats the odds and actually works, look out for an adaptation of bobbing for apples called "Hi, Bob!"Thursday
The latest singing competition series, "The Next" (8 p.m., WUCW, Ch. 23), has aspiring singers being mentored by Gloria Estefan, Joe Jonas, Nelly and John Rich, a foursome also referred to as "those guys who haven't gotten a call from 'American Idol.'"