It's my job to fire off a bull's-eye opinion in the heat of the moment, like a circus sharpshooter on a galloping horse. Sometimes that happens. Sometimes I shoot the horse.

Overexposure to bombastic, plotless toy commercials must be hazardous to my powers of comprehension. In 2009 I missed the point of some esoteric movies, I didn't push hard enough for worthy underdogs, I overpraised blandly proficient works. Some hits I just didn't get and still don't. How can anyone think "The Hangover" is funny? Yet it earned 90 gigabillion dollars.

Here's a sheepish mea culpa to you, dear readers, and to the gods of cinema. I resolve to do better this year.

Here are 10 other films where I missed the target in one way or another in 2009.

1. "Paranormal Activity" came to theaters with a deafening viral buzz, purporting to be found video footage from a haunted house. People were calling it this decade's "Blair Witch Project." I wanted to be hip, and I gave it a three-star review even though I had no interest in seeing it again.

Its plot was tissue-thin, its rigorously sloppy YouTube aesthetic was boring, the slow buildup to the scares took 90 of its 96 minutes, and the climactic "Boo" was a cheap cheat. I should have said so. I will turn in my hipster card now, as a good grownup should.

2. I was guilty of shameless Minnesota boosterism for the indie youth comedy "Nobody," damning it with faint praise. I failed to bring the hammer down simply because it was filmed here. Provincial small-town positivity stayed my hand. "Overall, it's as if someone bottled 85 minutes of Minnesota Nice," I wrote, and gave the film two stars. I gave the Coen brothers' locally shot "A Serious Man" four stars. Their movie was 1,000 times better. Do the math.

3.  I was way too generous with Sacha Baron Cohen's "Bruno" -- the one in which he plays a blond fashionista combination of Siegfried and Roy. The film had the feel of "Borat" warmed over. And then regurgitated. I made that point in my review, then gave it a positive three stars.

4. Ditto for Woody Allen's "Whatever Works," starring Larry David as the usual kvetchy malcontent. "Allen's 42nd film is slight but clever, enjoyable for all its faults. It works," concluded the three-star review.

5. I also grade-inflated Swedish maestro Jan Troell's "Everlasting Moments," a drab drama about a feminist photo pioneer, despite a title that sounds like a line of greeting cards. As with Allen's latest, I boosted my assessment in gratitude for the filmmakers' earlier, better work. It's easier to write a positive review or a negative review than a middling one, and both "Whatever Works" and "Everlasting Moments" were middling films.

6. I was blinded by my love for Ricky Gervais when I saw his latest. What a lovestruck aria I improvised: "Sublimely funny, slyly satirical and deliberately designed to upset Aunt Prissy, 'The Invention of Lying' weaves quite a wicked web." With the clarity of hindsight, it was a poorly structured movie with some A-list cameos and a cute premise -- a world where no one has the ability to be deceitful -- which leads to plenty of predictable, superficial jokes. In the final reels it wanders off the track and into religious parody that's more audacious than hilarious. OK, but hardly a cultural jewel.

7. Michael Moore's "Capitalism: A Love Story" got 3 1/2 stars. "A rollicking review of economic outrages and a scalding critique of insatiable greed," I called it.

Fair enough. But what was Moore doing, dragging in actor Wallace Shawn to discuss economics and ethics? The guy's last role was in "Southland Tales," which says everything you need to know about his judgment. And how many times have we seen variations on the scene where Moore drives up to AIG in an armored car and pulls out a bullhorn, demanding that federal bailout money be returned to the U.S. Treasury? Old shtick. I should have called him on it.

8.  I gave the year's funniest movie, Quentin Tarantino's "Inglourious Basterds," 3 1/2 stars. What did I want before giving it that final half star, a marching band? Sheesh!

9. I gave the same rating to "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince," but the film is just a placeholder, passing the baton of the series to the two final episodes. This is a movie where more tears are shed over unrequited teen love than the climactic death of a key character.

10. "Moon," a riveting piece of sci-fi existentialism and a virtual one-man show of acting prowess by Sam Rockwell (right), displayed a wire-walker's level of creative daring. No aliens, dystopic futures, or killer robots. Just a dude living on the moon, and maybe going bonkers. I gave it a paltry three stars. I must have been having a bad week.

And while we're on the subject of regrets, I adored Drew Barrymore's comedy "Whip It," starring Ellen Page as a frustrated Texas teen who finds her niche with an Austin roller-derby team. It was a box office dud. Dang. I wish I had been more persuasive.

The same goes for Wes Anderson's infectiously cheerful "The Fantastic Mr. Fox." I can only hope they find their audiences on DVD.

Colin Covert • 612-673-7186