As hot-mess holidays go, Halloween provides outstanding people watching. When else can you see a mermaid reproaching a puffed-up superhero for flirting with Miley Cyrus?

Next weekend people in fleshy ensembles will stagger freely from bar to bar. Mario and Luigi will squash beefs with bro-hugs. And somewhere a drunken Ninja Turtle will pass out in a pizza box. That's the magic of Halloween.

Wanting to avoid the debauchery is understandable. Don't let the blitzed-by-11 p.m. amateurs turn you into an All Hallow's Eve scrooge. From burlesque to bass drops, Halloween has something for you.

BareBones extravaganza

This imaginative puppet brigade and its team of volunteers bring the 21st annual art performance back to Hidden Falls Regional Park. The life-size puppetry pageant often includes fire dancers, stilted creatures and music honoring the circle of life.

7 p.m., Sat., Sun., Thu., Oct. 31 and Nov. 1, all ages, $10-$20 suggested donation, 1313 Hidden Falls Dr., St. Paul, www.barebonespuppets.org

Horror Festival III

The third annual eerie theater fest returns to the Southern Theater with nine original productions and a freebie late-night movie series. Check the website for showtimes.

Now through Nov. 2, $14-$15, 1420 Washington Av. S., Mpls., 612-340-0155,

www.tchorrorfestival.com

Dubstep blowout

This annual bass addicts' blowout features four stages of performers throughout the Skyway Theatre, led by U.K. dubstep vet Doctor P, Los Angeles drop-a-holic Protohype and London's Trolley Snatcha. Plus, horror flick showings, a costume contest and more.

7 p.m. Oct. 31, $25, 18-plus, 711 Hennepin Av. S., Mpls., 612-333-6100, www.skywaytheater.com

Glow Crazy

While the "Blackout Glow Crazy" theme might perk the ears of pseudo-raving molly goblins, this Mall of America event is super PG (note the SpongeBob appearance). But don't hate on nostalgic flume rides in the dark (black-light mode starts at 7 p.m.) before late-night activities.

5-10 p.m. Fri., Sat. and Oct. 31, 5000 Center Court, Bloomington, 952-883-8800,

www.nickelodeonuniverse.com

Swedish ghosts

Take an hourlong tour of the supposedly haunted Turnblad Mansion with a pair of cocktails, as curator Curt Pederson regales the group with supernatural tales and "ghostly evidence" obtained by Twin Cities Paranormal Society's 2013 investigation.

6-7 p.m. and 7:30-8:30 p.m. Oct. 31, $30, 21-plus, 2600 Park Av. S., Mpls., 612-871-4907,

www.asimn.org

Yee-Haw-lo-ween

It's a vodka Red Bull rodeo — Halloween style — at Toby Keith's I Love This Bar, that sprawling cowboy saloon in an upscale shopping center. Pound $3 Miller Lite cans to the sounds of Maiden Dixie and vie for costume supremacy for $500 and concert tickets.

9 p.m. Oct. 31, 1623 Park Pl. Blvd., St. Louis Park, 763-450-9999, www.countrybarmn.com

Black Ball

This first-ever "Black Ball," uh, lights up party palace International Market Square with best-costume prizes and a vague promise of two levels of entertainment.

7 p.m. Oct. 31, $20-$50, $280-$680 VIP tables, 275 Market St., Mpls., www.vitalculture.com

Boo-lesque

Cabaret and burlesque troupe Le Cirque Rouge anchors the Amsterdam Bar and Hall's Halloween festivities with tarot card readers, a monster jazz band and music from Iguano, Kiss or Kill, the Splendid End and DJ Instigator. Oh, and a potentially horrifying "3-D live birth."

7:30 p.m. Oct. 31, $10-$12, 21-plus, $50-$100 tables, 6 W. 6th St., St. Paul, 612-285-3112,

www.amsterdambarandhall.com

Dance for the Beast

Local dance promoter SIMshows provides the thumping soundtrack and light show to this North Loop soiree at Muse Event Center. Proceeds benefit In the Heart of the Beast Puppet & Mask Theatre, which will perform with 20-foot-tall puppets.

9 p.m. Oct. 31, $10-$75 advance, 107 3rd Av. N., Mpls., 612-345-8344, www.simshows.com

Transmission or treat

DJ Jake Rudh's hump-day party again takes over the plush Varsity Theater for its popular Halloween bash. Expect indie-rock cool kids to pack the dance floor and photo booth, plus costume prizes, a video screen and a Bowie tune or two.

10 p.m. Wed., free, 1308 SE. 4th St., Mpls.,

612-604-0222, www.varsitytheater.org

First Avenue

Downtown Minneapolis' darling danceteria gets spooky and funky with DJ FooLProof, Forever Young's MC Cloud, DJ Espada, Mike 2600, DJ Smitty, Roy Freedom and more, while barroom jester Ian Rans hosts and DJ Verb X rocks the Record Room. The best costumes win cash and concert tickets.

8 p.m. Oct. 31, $5-$15, 18-plus, 701 1st Av. N., Mpls., 612-332-1775, www.first-avenue.com

Michael Rietmulder writes about beer, cocktails and nightlife.