the food

FOODS ON A STICKSticks and the Minnesota State Fair share a proud history. Teddy Roosevelt delivered his famous "Speak softly and carry a big stick" speech at the fairgrounds in 1901, and the Pronto Pup, a batter-dipped and deep-fried hot dog on a stick (today sold at seven State Fair stands), has exemplified quintessential fairgrounds fare since 1947. That staying power has surely inspired countless vendors to impale -- and inevitably plunge into simmering grease -- everything but the kitchen sink in their search for enduring fair-wide acclaim.

This year's Great Minnesota Get-Together boasts 56 speared taste sensations. Standouts include Mocha on a Stick (Minnesota Farmers Union Coffee Shop, Dan Patch Av. and Cosgrove St.), a Ph.D-level Fudgsicle that blends ice cream, chocolate and espresso, crafted especially for the fair by St. Paul's Grand Ole Creamery; the hugely popular Pork Chop on a Stick, a sizzling, smoky hunk of meat (Carousel BBQ, Liggett St. and Dan Patch Av. and Peterson's Chicken and Chops, Underwood St. and Judson Av.), and the self-explanatory Key Lime Pie on a Stick, which doesn't sound terribly Minnesotan, except that it's frozen. And chocolate-covered. And fabulous. (Original Key Lime Pie Bar, Carnes Av. and Underwood St.)

SAUSAGE SISTER AND MEFOOD BUILDINGBored by corn dogs? Whether they're wrapping zesty chorizo with bread dough or twirling puff pastry around soy- and ginger-laced pork sausages, siblings Cherie Peterson and Merry Barry (with an assist from the skilled sausagemakers at Lorentz Meats in Cannon Falls, Minn.) playfully ramp up the fair's Pronto Pup quotient.

Nitro Ice CreamFOOD BUILDINGDon't hold their Iowa roots against chemical engineers Will Schroeder and T.J. Paskach. Their patented flash-freeze process -- which doubles as a trippy "Young Frankenstein"-ish side show -- transforms milk into rich, silky vanilla ice cream in a split-second. Have it scooped into a pretzel cone.

MINNESOTA APPLESAGRICULTURE-HORTICULTURE BUILDINGStop by for cool, sweetly refreshing cider, pressed from Beacons, Paula Reds and other poetically named Gopher State apples. Then stay for a Cider Freeze, an icy cider shard squeezed into a plastic sleeve that should really be renamed Air Conditioner Not on a Stick.

SWEET MARTHA'S COOKIE JARCLOUGH ST. AND JUDSON AV. & DAN PATCH AV. AND CHAMBERS ST.Silver-dollar-size chocolate-chip cookies, warm from the oven and stacked, perilously high, in cups and buckets; what's not to like? And talk about truth in advertising: Owner Martha Rossini Olson, the fair's version of Mrs. Fields, really is a sweetie.

GRANNY'S APPLESFOOD BUILDINGIts screaming chartreuse color and fizzy Granny Smith apple flavor make Batch No. 6 soda -- bottled in St. Cloud, Minn. -- a welcome alternative to the fair's relentless cola and lemon-lime landscape.

GIGGLES' CAMPFIRE GRILLCOOPER ST. AND LEE AV.Co-owners Doug Holter and Tim Weiss, the fair's leading culinary innovators, take their North Woods shtick way beyond the log cabin setting with a lengthy (and delicious) wild game-focused menu: elk-wild rice meatballs, pan-fried walleye-trout-wild rice cakes, a venison-boar-elk bratwurst and more. The big yard filled with picnic tables, a fair rarity, is another bonus.

ALL-YOU-CAN-DRINK MILKJUDSON AV. AND CLOUGH ST.Just how wholesome is the fair? The fairgrounds' busiest bar has been serving milk -- almost 300,000 glasses of Minnesota-made 2 percent (and 1 percent chocolate) annually -- since 1955. It's all you can guzzle, for a buck. Most visitors average three 12-ounce chugs.

TOM THUMB DONUTSUNDERWOOD ST. AND CARNES AV. & COOPER ST. AND DAN PATCH AV.Among the fair's deep-fried house of horrors (deep-fried Snickers bars and Twinkies), a few naturally rise to the top, the summit belonging to the beloved mini-doughnut. Sure, a small bag is a diet-busting 500 calories, but these bite-size, melt-in-your-mouth, sugar-coated carb bombs are pure, unadulterated joy. No wonder an average of 300,000 dozen are sold at Tom Thumb and other stands each year; that's a bag for one out of every five fairgoers.

SCHUMACHER'S AT THE FAIRCARNES AV. AND UNDERWOOD ST.A 2003 act by the Legislature finally brought wine to the fair, and not a moment too soon. And John Schumacher really gets it right, pouring Minnesota-made wines by the glass and by flights.

WILD RICE SPECIALTIESFOOD BUILDINGGet a memorable taste of Minnesota's official state grain with hand-pattied half-pound beef and wild rice burgers on toasted, buttered buns and a pork-wild rice sausage on a baguette smothered with onions and peppers.

THE MOUTH TRAPFOOD BUILDINGReferring, unkindly, to Wisconsin as "Curdland" doesn't stop xenophobic fairgoers from joining a line similar to those outside Apple stores on iPhone release day. They'll swallow their feelings for America's Dairyland for a shot at its unofficial dish, the cheese curd. It's a Cheetos-size hunk of squeaky, rubbery, straight-from-the-factory Cheddar that has been subjected, like any self-respecting fair food, to batter and a deep fryer. No wonder it's one of the fair's top-selling foods.

DAIRY GOODNESS BAREMPIRE COMMONSSpeaking of popular, the wait-weary might freak when first witnessing the inevitable long lines at this ice cream behemoth, but not to worry; the hard-working crew keeps things moving at a gallop. Be on the lookout for a tasty newbie: malts and sundaes topped with fresh-picked strawberries from White Bear Lake's Pine Tree Orchard.

LINGONBERRY ICE CREAMUNDERWOOD ST. AND CARNES AV.The sign says it all: "You don't have to be Scandinavian to love lingonberries." Indeed, especially when the tangy taste of this far-northern cousin to the cranberry is blended into a locally made small-batch ice cream. Hot enough for you? Get a heat-busting soda, a tall cup filled with the lovely lilac-tinted ice cream and lingonberry juice and topped with fizzy water.

LYNN'S POTATO LEFSEFOOD BUILDINGThird-, fourth- and fifth-generation Norwegian-Americans probably only encounter lefse at holidays, an old-timer's curiosity lovingly prepared by a well-meaning great-aunt. But fairgoers owe it to themselves to try this grilled potato flatbread -- a Norwegian tortilla, perhaps? -- made in Blair, Wis. Just keep it simple: spread with butter, sprinkled with sugar. Ah, himmel; that's Norwegian for heaven.

HAMLINE UNITED METHODIST CHURCH DINING HALLCOOPER ST. AND DAN PATCH AV.Praise the Lord and pass the ham loaf and Jell-O Fluff. Church-sponsored dining halls have thrived for more than a century at the fair, and 2007 marks this St. Paul congregation's 110th fairgrounds year. Celebrate with baked chicken and mashed potatoes and gravy, or pot roast with baked beans, coleslaw and a corn muffin, or some other affordable, clean-cut, stick-to-your-ribs combination. As part of the anniversary festivities, all desserts are $1.10.

1919 ROOT BEERDAN PATCH AV. AND UNDERWOOD ST.Go ahead, it's the fair. Indulge in a big, frosty float, brimming with foamy, richly flavored root beer brewed in New Ulm, Minn.

SALEM EVANGELICAL LUTHERAN CHURCHCOSGROVE ST. AND RANDALL AV.This Minneapolis congregation's 56-year-old dining hall is memorable for its sweet bible-camp surroundings (love that screen porch-style dining room), friendly table service, fast breakfasts (pancakes, eggs, bacon, French toast) and hearty lunches and dinners: Swedish meatballs or Swiss steak with all the fixings, sandwiches and chili ("It's a little tame for chili," said Salem member Mario Carrillo with a laugh. "Lutherans don't put a lot of spice in it."), all washed down with cups of the church's famous -- or is that infamous? -- Swedish egg coffee. Look for the big blue coffee pot on the roof, and pick up a copy of the church's cookbook, "Fruit of the Spirit."

FRESH FRENCH FRIESLIGGETT ST. AND CARNES AV. & JUDSON AV. AND NELSON ST.Fresh, sure, but they might want to add "plentiful" and "piping hot" to the big yellow sign at this fair favorite, a fixture since 1972.

CORN ROASTDAN PATCH AV. AND NELSON ST.Commemorate Minnesota's status as the nation's second-largest corn-producing state by standing in line at this perennially popular stand, where sweet corn (hand-picked daily at a Monticello, Minn., farm) is roasted in the husk before being shucked and then dunked in butter. Truly, it doesn't get much better than that. In a banner year, owner Brad Ribar will sell 170,000 cobs, so it's hard to believe that his stand has only been around since 1985. "Back then, no one had ever even heard of roasted corn," he said. "I mean, if there was even one little black kernel, people said we burned it. Now people ask for it that way."

MINNESOTA HONEY PRODUCERSAGRICULTURE-HORTICULTURE BUILDINGNothing quenches a thirst quite like honey-laced lemonade, and honey-sunflower and honey-nut-fudge ice creams are fairly effective at dropping the dewpoint a few notches on a steaming late-summer afternoon.

TEJASTHE GARDENThis busy Tex-Mex-er stuffs scrambled eggs, grilled onions and peppers and a perky salsa roja into a big-as-your-head breakfast burrito, and prices it to move at just $2.50. There's even a free cup of coffee.

WEST INDIES SOULFOOD BUILDINGJerk-style chicken wings: meaty, crispy-skinned things marinated in a blend of heat-generating spices that start with a whisper before erupting into a shout.

NEW FOODS

Each year, vendors brainstorm for food ideas that will take the fairgrounds by storm and generate a small hedge fund. Some of the more intriguing -- burp -- entries in this year's sweepstakes include apple fries -- julienned apples, crumb-coated and deep-fried -- at Coaster's (Liggett St. and Carnes Av.), Sloppy Joes on a Stick (Axel's, southeast exterior corner of Food Building), Spam Burgers (Spam Burgers, Carousel Park), the Uffda Brat -- a Norwegian brat wrapped in lefse and gingerly speared with a toothpick ("Who says a toothpick isn't a stick?" said co-owner Cherie Peterson) at Sausage Sister and Me (Food Building) and the BeerGarita, a margarita made with beer (Tejas, the Garden). Cheers.

The placesAgriculture-Horticulture Building

Farming's big-business status is reflected in this enormous fairgrounds landmark, a distinctive octagonal tower that dates to 1947. Inside is a tangle of popular exhibition halls, arranged spokes-on-a-wheel style and crammed with fascinating amusements. There are prize-winning vegetables (last year's winner of the giant pumpkin contest -- grown by Bill Foss of Buffalo, Minn., -- weighed in at 813.5 pounds), a faux supermarket with shelves stocked with Minnesota-produced products and a fascinating glimpse into the lives of honeybees.

You don't need a Walker Art Center membership to appreciate the artistry on display at the Crop Show Exhibition Hall, its portraits, landscapes, cartoons and political statements all painstakingly crafted with glue and seeds (go to www.cropart.com for a stunning photo gallery). On your way out, tap your inner 4-H-er and try to identify the seeds in question with the crop fair art quiz.

CREATIVE ACTIVITIES BUILDINGLEE AV. BETWEEN UNDERWOOD ST. AND COOPER ST.The Smithsonian of the fairgrounds is where prize-winning pies, cakes, muffins, breads, pickles, jams and other food arts (from nearly 2,000 blue ribbon-seeking hopefuls) are displayed in all their oogle-worthy glory. It's also the place for day-in-and day-out demonstrations; learn about cake decorating, bread baking, candymaking, canning and more (for schedules, go to www.mnstatefair.org).

Shoppers should head to the building's annex, home to epicuriosities that range from lefsemaking equipment and 9- by 13-inch baking pans topped with lids embossed with baker's names to the fair's most fashionable freebie, a paper hat in the shape of a dill pickle, courtesy of Chaska-based Gedney Pickles.

Oh, yeah, don't miss the theatrics of the Ron Popeil wannabes hawking Swiss Pro Vegetable Peelers and Fruit-K-Bobs, which in sheer entertainment value rivals anything playing the Grandstand.

OLD IRON SHOWHistory buffs will appreciate the meticulously restored Minneapolis-Moline, John Deere and Allis-Chalmers tractors and other farm implements, some approaching the century mark and all rare, fully operational and fascinating. There are demonstrations and wonderfully chatty volunteers.

EDUCATION BUILDINGAlso known as Freebie Central. The pick of the litter is a tiny red pine seedling for your back yard at Minnesota Forest Industries, a rare fair souvenir that will grow in stature, literally. And only the truly brave will step right up -- for all to see, so visit pre-cheese curd -- on the embarrassingly accurate scale operated by the Weights & Measures Division of the Minnesota Department of Commerce.

BUTTER SCULPTURESEMPIRE COMMONSAuguste Rodin probably never considered butter a credible artistic medium, but for Linda Christensen, official court carver to Princess Kay of the Milky Way and her retinue, an 85-pound block of Minnesota-made Grade A butter is a consummate blank slate. "If it weren't for the working conditions, everyone would use it; it's forgiving," Christensen told the Star Tribune in 2001.

This summer marks Christensen's 36th year as the fair's butter sculptor-in-residence, a title that requires her to chisel a different dairy queen's likeness on each of the fair's 12 days. Dressed for a blizzard inside a 38-degree studio, Christensen and her subjects are a G-rated sideshow that has been one of the fair's top crowd-pleasers since 1965. The butter busts don't go to waste after Labor Day. Each subject gets to keep Christensen's handiwork, where their stabs at buttered immortality slowly go to good use garnishing small-town pancake breakfasts and corn feeds and acting as the occasional wedding banquet centerpiece.

LIVESTOCK COMPLEXGet up close and personal with hundreds of Herefords, Charlolais and Limousins -- and watch a milking machine in action -- in the enormous Cattle Barn. Marvel over the swines', well, swinish behavior in the Swine Barn, and see how your cock-a-doodle-dos and baaaaas compare with the real thing inside the Sheep and Poultry Barn. A free and lively tour of the livestock complex starts every 20 minutes in front of the Sheep and Poultry barn.

CHS MIRACLE OF BIRTH CENTERJUDSON AV. AND CLOUGH ST.Witness one of the approximately 200 births -- calves, lambs and piglets -- that take place over the course of the fair's 12-day run. Or pet a piglet, shear a lamb or watch a cow being milked.

leftoversCOMPOSTINGWhat happens to leftover fair food? For the first time, food waste will be collected and composted, eventually to return as fertilizer for the fairgrounds' gardens.

MINNESOTA COOKS DAYWatch Twin Cities chefs Brenda Langton (Cafe Brenda and Spoonriver), Lenny Russo (Heartland), Alex Roberts (Restaurant Alma), J.P. Samuelson (jP American Bistro) and others in action as they demonstrate cooking with local ingredients. Tuesday in Carousel Park. Free.

OH, WHAT A RELIEF IT ISPepto-Bismol and Alka-Seltzer are on hand at the fair's first aid stations (Dan Patch Av. and Liggett St. & Cosgrove St. and Wright Av.)

THIRST-QUENCHERFreebie alert: Cool down with a glass of crystal-clear water from Culligan. (Dan Patch Av. and Cosgrove St.)

Rick Nelson • rdnelson@startribune.com