C.J.: Creator lets the gatto out of the bag about Lorenzo

  • Article by: C.J. , Star Tribune
  • Updated: November 21, 2012 - 6:57 PM

Deceptively handsome Lorenzo Lucid could've had a mess of Thanksgiving meals, delicious or romantic, with Facebook.com friends who like him.

If only the Lucid Brewing-loving Italian from "Excelsior" were real.

One of the hottest guys on Facebook (more than 3,000 friends like him) and Twitter (2,700 followers) is the crafty creation of AB Geist PR guy Chris Birt, who's relieved to have the ruse exposed here.

"You can blow Lorenzo's cover. It's TOO MUCH PRESSURE for me!" said Birt. "The only other option is to be reincarnated as a hot Italian myself."

I assume your wife would have a problem with that? "Yes. I have a very hot blond Scandinavian who thinks I'm friggin' nuts." To prove how un-nuts his wife is, she has refused to befriend Lorenzo on Facebook. Of course, Birt's wife had more information than the three women who posted these messages:

"Hello Lorenzo, I like the name of your beer. I, too, believe in living lucidly. I know this must seem strange but would you like to have a beer sometime? I just have a feeling we might get along."

"Nice pic Lorenzo ... And I hope you had fun under the Tuscan sun ... Great movie, lol ;)" "

"I don't want to seem forward but r u single?"

Birt claims to have been stone cold sober and lucid nine months ago when Lorenzo popped into the ad guy's creative head while working on the Lucid Brewing account. Many women have been seduced by Lorenzo's good looks and his pig Italian, which comes from what's left of what Birt learned during the five years his family spent in Milan when he was an elementary and middle school student.

"When I created the logo for the brand, that little icon, a little eye on a beer glass, I could see a little person in the logo. I just started referring to him as Lorenzo. Then I thought I had to have something better looking than an eye with an eyebrow, so I went on Google and searched 'hot, Italian, guy' and this guy's picture came up," Birt said, cracking himself up. "He was the first picture I saw. We put a mustache on him for Movember!"

Lucid Brewing products occupy four spots on Vita.mn's list of the 10 "Best Twin Cities Beers."

A gushing Birt doesn't want to give all the credit to Lorenzo: "Lorenzo made our online presence phenomenal, but it's good beer. Lucid Brewing has more beers on the best-of list than any other brewery, and it was founded in December 2011."

There were plenty of clues that Lorenzo was a faker in his educational background information.

"It says he studied brewing at Brandeis, where Lorenzo wanted to study under Alberto Einstein but he wasn't there. Lorenzo received both an aerospace engineering degree from the University of Minnesota and semiotics degree from the University of Bologna in the same year. "There's no way to make that happen even online," said Birt. "He also BSes about studying under Umberto Eco, the famous Italian author."

The detail that should have made Lorenzo about as date-worthy as Twitter's Bronx Zoo Cobra is this from his fictional time at Gettysburg College: "This is where I meet my first wife who is beautiful bionda! I lose her in the Mountains."

Key ring makes a Living

Leather Works Minnesota's $35 Iron Range key ring is featured on page 23 of the December issue of Martha Stewart Whole Living.

"I don't know. I don't know how they found it," said Kent Begnaud, who runs the St. Paul Park business with his wife, Lee, and son Nathan. Here's a picture of the key ring from their website: www.startribune.com/a1910.

Well-dressed, well-spelled

Tony Fly is finally spelling his first name correctly and about to start dressing better.

The former host of the "Tone E Fly Morning Show," who recently parted ways with KTWN-FM, has found a spokesmodeling gig with J. Hilburn, men's custom clothier.

Andi Van Guilder, exec partner at J. Hilburn, fit Fly on Monday for an event next month at Bin Wine Bar in St. Paul. "He was very nice to work with and has such an awesome voice," said Van Guilder.

C.J. is at 612.332.TIPS or cj@startribune.com. E-mailers, please state a subject -- "Hello" doesn't count. Attachments are not opened, so don't even try. More of her attitude can be seen on Fox 9 Thursday mornings.

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