Little Benny's Notebook, by Lee Pape, appears to have been a syndicated feature aimed at children – or possibly easily amused adults – in the early 1920s. I had to turn off Word's autocorrect feature to type up this one from the pages of the Minneapolis Morning Tribune.
The most ixciting of trees to have erround is froot trees. If you know wat kind of froot tree it is you can always tell wat kind of froot to expect, because the most serprizing thing a froot tree could do would be to give some other kind of froot. One of the most useless looking sites there is is a apple tree with nothing on it but leeves. The hite of luxury is to lay under a apple tree and have a apple drop neer you but not on you.
Some peeple can tell all the different kinds of trees by the different leeves, wile others jest know they are meer trees by their shape and seem satisfied to even know that mutch. The greener a tree is the better it looks and the better it proberly feels.
Every tree has a lot of roots down under the ground doing all the werk, wile the tree sticks up and gets all the credit.
Squirrels jump erround in trees like other peeple jump erround on the ground, proving it all depends on wat youre used to.
Some of the things that come from trees are rubber, switches, acorns, maple sirrup and toothpick.
More from Star Tribune
More from Yesterday's News
"We're more popular than Jesus now," John Lennon told an British journalist in 1966. A year later, the Monkees' Mike Nesmith, in the Twin Cities for a show at the St. Paul Auditorium, humbly explained his band's place in the cosmic pecking order.
Read it in the voice of Garrison Keillor for the full effect.
A musically inclined vagrant known as Banjo Ben walked the streets of Minneapolis in the city's early days. His weakness for alcohol and penchant for strong language landed him in court with some frequency. In February 1876, for example, he was sentenced to 20 days in jail for spewing obscenities at the St. Paul and Pacific depot. Later that year, he walked into the Tribune newsroom and issued an invitation to witness a spectacular feat at the new suspension bridge under construction nearby.
Mabel Herbert Urner's serialized accounts of a fictional New York couple began appearing in the Minneapolis Tribune in July 1910.
Did Drew Pearson push off Nate Wright before snaring the winning touchdown pass in the Vikings' heartbreaking loss to Dallas in a 1975 divisional playoff game at Met Stadium? A Minneapolis Tribune account published the next day is clear: We wuz robbed.