Sometime last week, we saw a tweet from Twitter pal Amber -- we've never actually met her in person, which is how things go these days -- suggesting that she couldn't wait until Saturday when she was going to try KFC's new Double Down that all the kids are talking about. What is a Double Down? Two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets (Original Recipe® or Grilled), two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel's Sauce. And yes, the chicken acts as the bun. While eating one of these creations isn't necessarily a sport, it seemed close enough to see if Amber would consider a guest post on the experience. In addition, the Double Down seemed right up the alley of the RandBall readership, while also nicely adding to the sometimes sparse Uterine-American representation on this here blog. Amber delivered, and now she has the floor. Amber describes herself as "Amber Jones is a local business lady that occasionally moonlights as an amateur (at best) food and sports blogger." Her friend, Richard Conley, took the photos. Amber?

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Going into this challenge I debated about how I was going to prepare my body for the glorious train wreck it was about to consume. Upon arriving at KFC, I got super excited to tackle this beast of a sandwich. I already decided in advance to go with the original recipe patties, because I am quite convinced that a sandwich made of two grilled patties would rank somewhere around gnawing on a shoe. Dalton, our chef, said he'd hook us up with fresh patties. SCORE! We also got sides of fries and mashed potatoes, which were totally unnecessary, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't munch on them while waiting for the Double-Down. When she came out and I cracked open her carton, and oh man what a glorious sight! She was piping hot and glistening...with grease. I pressed my finger into one of the patties and it was slick with enough cardiac fuel to keep 17 county fairs in business.

The first bite was heaven. Loaded with cheese, bacon, and the Colonel's special sauce, She was every bit as flavorful and shameful as I'd dreamed. The bun, er ... patties, were super juicy but wonderfully crunchy on the outside and the sauce had a rather surprising kick to it -- definitely Minnesota "spicy." My one complaint is that it could use more than 2 meager strips of bacon, because I couldn't really tell it was there. Also, be prepared to load up on napkins, because the paper wrapper she dons is hardly enough to contain her glory.

Did I put down that entire heart-stopping hellion? Abso-freaking-lutely (with ease, might I add). Did I have any sense of regret or remorse regarding my actions? Maybe a little; the heartburn started to kick in after about a half an hour, and the after-taste of grease hung around with me for hours. HOURS. However, if you want to live dangerously and cross one off your bucket list, the Double Down might be the exhilarating near-death experience you're looking for.

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OK, RandBallers: Have you/would you try the Double Down? And do you have any other food experiences that rank near Amber's experience? For us, it was probably eating the King Kong burger in Omaha. That was 1.5 pounds of ground beef, and we consumed ever last bit of it ... and felt the shame/pride for a long time thereafter.